If you can make things better then do so, but never at the expense of others, try to better yourself or others, not taking everything into account, when it comes to the safety needs of others with respect to your story whether publicly known or privately known by details about you, blame you for sharing stories about your life, which were thought to be later used as the basis for attack upon others, by guns, that’s your identity as known, and that’s something only you know, and don’t know who else knows, not by your numbers, so building a website was to make things better, that was writing everyday for more than a year, not able to get a job, and barely able to finish my masters, no secreting of words to mean anything else other than the life I have lived, it is true that what is thought of you, is what you were thought to be, or treated as in lieu of not alluding to attacks created by others, they thought your identity was the cause for attack to begin with: (1) Jewish (temple), (2) Enamourment (shot love interest), or any other incident including (3) San Bernadino (where I have never stated is where Richard Roby was from who hit on me on Facebook too, who’s half-brother is Kenyan Martin a professional NBA player, I later found out). So this is information known to them, not connected to me, only upon stating looks like a communication from me to cause, or through a representation of my interests or the interests of others caused, to attack my credibility or story in life not shared at length. If I got sued, it is therefore not my place to continue to share my story, and that was the risk I took launching a website, when things were not going right, didn’t sit and watch everything go down, became proactive writing books, and trying to figure out for myself what made sense to say, when, mostly before anything bad happened, I don’t think anyone needs to be on board with you when you decide to share your mind in public, but I also think if you are made to feel like the enemy to anyones story, even your own, that’s something you talk to the police about who I have been calling since 2013, so don’t treat me like Im half gone, everyone thinking Im guilty or the cause, and not think that Im a team player having applied to the US Navy February 2009 before attending law school, because Im on meds, they could not take me. So that’s how I guess they typically decide for themselves whos an expense, or poses a risk of harm to others, based upon how present you are in the eyes, or mentally by speech, how quick you speak or think, to anyone observing you that determines how put together you are, or whether you are made to feel scared and have a knowledge of something you are not telling others. I don’t keep secrets Im always honest, I don’t talk about others, I only talk about myself, and I don’t misrepresent people, not if I am under attack, usually when you are well you go out of your way to help people, and at the expense should it continue, are tested to see whether its something you really care about and well versed on concepts you have been taught, or whether you are over-extending yourself into matters for political purposes in life just to be on the right team in life and not defend OJ, Im not an avoidant person, Im pretty straightforward in my language, how I think, and always manage to say the right thing in a natural way, not conclusive about anyone or anything trying to arriving to a solution in life, that’s called “being in the solution.” Maybe terminology not everyone is familiar with your odds for f-king up in life decreasing so long as you are doing everything right in life, which has included staying home, going to sleep at 8 every night, and staying in my room as my Dad shouted at me 2017, not to run at night, which was when they were filming a scary movie next door, I ran through set the sidewalked blocked, in the bright lights. That’s not me being provocative or inconsiderate of any profession I have supported since the beginning of my term blogging online 2013, and its only been made to be a serious endeavor 2020 (8 years later) when a value and ranking were placed on my website compared to all other websites online, and information centers available in the world by comparison, Im sure my website is very personal, and very traumatic, had I not been bipolar, I probably would have thought I was right more times than wrong, then where would I be, probably too confident, and put down the same in life, seems to always happen that way, the better off you are, the more you have to lose, the less you have the more you have gain, and the further away from the issues you venture, not of your own making, the longer it takes to get back to where you were: confident or happy for that matter. So Im sorry I was punished, that was probably everyones disagreement, with me having posted flyers, and probably for a campaign not affecting this state specifically, and with a risky subject matter chosen as course for alleviating whatever blames were boiling beneathe the surface but things no one ever thought to say out loud, like maybe that was the problem, you don’t really blame things going well, no wonder why so many dramatic changes took place in terms of our access to resources, when its time to slow down and when its time to speed up: book stores are back, means we are doing a good job, have time to relax, that’s not “cushion for the pushin” so to speak, that means the same odds are against you as a public speaker: (1) don’t offend anyone (2) you are only allowed to be helpless once (3) you have to restate recant or remove anything that’s not working in your mind about things probably wont work for someone else hearing from you (4) inform who you support of any changes being made in your life, and not subject them to similar attacks as though they are meant for everything related: mental health issues we can get covered minus all the over-usage of terms relating to “violence” where nothing need be stated, that hasn’t already suffered such as: music, and film, yes it was a job worth taking, they were victims. That doesn’t mean that if I help someone that I have guilt, there is no such thing as cover ups in life, when your up your up, if your down your down, and if you don’t report in you get lost, and if you cant speak no one speaks for you, and when you end up in jail you either stay there or you write an attorneys phone number on your arm so someone can get you out, that means the harm has already happened, and if you don’t know what harm was caused, means that you are someone who is not trusted or who is being put to blame for someone elses feelings in life disorientations or punished for speaking to subjects too large for your mind to grasp what graver risks are at stake for mentioning your viewpoints, without having the resume that supports your understanding of life in that way to which others can appreciate your opinion so stick to what your good at, so that’s an IMDb you may pass go and we will collect $200, basically, thank you. I always believe in the arts, because they are purveyors of feelings and masters at story-telling, they can make you cry, be scared, can cram a whole life into two hours in a memorable way, explain a generation of differences of opinion, and in a way that’s still funny now like a blue car in the move: Office Space, with a license plate I just noticed, if its been seen its been covered by them and then some, so there is no need to wonder why everyone that things are about are low key and why people who are representing everyone who things were made to be about referenced to characteristically are shining, they are shining for us it is their job to do so. I have auditioned once before for a “cereal commercial” in the “Henry Radio” building on Bundy, which we were later told I was not ready for, I don’t think performing was meant for someone like me, maybe not bright or mature enough for it, so don’t let one audition make or break you in life, you will apply to many jobs, you may have many short term jobs until you find the right job, and you may care about a lot of crazy things in life, but whats more important is to care about those who officially care like the US Navy, who Im sure blocked me at one point because I grew up on a street off of Bristol, 200 N. Rockingham, featured in the movie: Sideways I was told, in the background. So no never that famous, and Im sure whatever pride my family did have, as having a normal life, has been tainted by me becoming known and the opposite to have come true for me, that’s not leadership, that’s someone to pick on in life because I react, that’s not flipping out, that’s trying to “hold center” (for all the ballerina analogies thought to ever be remotely related to me or what I look like or what others look like, we were never compared, only told to be more like eachother, not different, and that’s why me and my best friends, all separated and became popularly independently of one another). I never want to be in a place in life where theyre not sure whether to respond or cant respond, means things are either not going well for me, or for them, and need to make things better for a start: here, before reaching out communication wise to anyone, in the middle of a down, that much they should be able to rise above in life, you either listen, and take the lead of your friends who are doing well, or you try to live life alone and focus on your studies and that was the biggest mistake of my life. Had I known that microscopic elements of any piece of my identity were ever used to uplift others from the ashes of “Rockingham Ave” as though it was a “sad home” or of “trees falling” we actually had trees with these pieces in brown that you could remove and let into the air and were little brown flakes. Unique, the Fikah trees were put on Wilshire, redesigned by Barack Obama with stimulus funds.
My Reverend’s company logo was a hand, we met at Interfaith March, I contacted her.
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AuthorLeslie Fischman Archives
July 2021
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