Its important firstly, not to blame yourself “for your loved one’s suicide in any way” its not your fault. We may not be able to control all the events in our lives, “psychiatrists theorize … we would rather fault ourselves for a tragic occurrence than accept our inability to prevent it.”  Suicide following a diagnosis of depression makes one a “victim of disease, [and] just like cancer victims … [do not] deserve blame” is one way to look at things.  Much like a Holocaust Victim’s suicide, it is questionable whether “[their] emotional wounds [were] so deep that their pain continued to resonate” that may be so, in cases involving survivors of gun violence … pain that has the potential to “resonate and build for years afterward.”  Its important to understand the “common threads that help us understand that we are not alone in the confusing sorrow we face” by studying the stories of others, we can hopefully learn from their experiences and not repeat the same mistakes ourselves when it comes to asking for help.  Its important to note that “suicide is rarely a sudden occurrence … [and that] far more often [is] the result of a long, debilitating breakdown of an individuals emotional health.”  Based on those who have survived suicide, “the primary goal of a suicide is not to end life, but to end pain.”  Its common to put yourself in their shoes, while trying to empathize and understand “what we would have to feel to make the same choice,” that’s arguably not a healthy step in the right direction, because upon “imagin[ing] our loved one in that kind of pain [is] almost too much to even consider.”  The main flaw is imaging through a healthy mind, that is your mind, its important to note that “the suicidal person has a distorted view of their world.”  In that case, maybe its time to fix distortions following tragic life events, how to view the world in a way that we can achieve the same kind of peace of mind, as before the experience of trauma. For example, in suicide notes, they can be more misleading than helpful in understanding the point of view of the victim, assuming they understood everything, or got all the help they needed, or understood fully what was happening to them psychologically, that’s not true.  There are many stages of grief: (1) Shock, (2) Denial, (3) Guilt, (4) Sadness, (5) Anger, and (6) Acceptance. “Up to 70% of people who die by suicide may suffer from what psychiatrists call an “affective illness” such as major depression or a bipolar disorder.” 
There are common difficulties faced when coping with life's difficulties remember that you are not alone and you can always ask for help, and can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255. It may take awhile to “move past each setback, loss, and misfortune” remind yourself that we are all in this together, you can ask for help, no matter how small your problem is, and while you may endure pain through each trauma associated to the causes you support, we are here for you. Trust your systems of support … we are all new to this: #endviolence #stopsuicide. Sincerely, #mymollydoll for #teamenough as per our telephone conversation 10/21/18, am now making an extended effort to share a pamphlet I got from American Association of Suicidology Spring 2018 by Jeffrey Jackson.
A Handbook for Survivors of Suicide by Jeffrey Jackson