Re: The Fight at Bungalow Santa Monica 11/14/17 (Relapse after 7 months Sober)
Its unfortunate whenever you give up your sobriety date, its usually due to: (1) lack of acceptance of self or (2) lack of acceptance of others. When in combination, the two issues collide you: (1) go into depression and (2) hurt yourself and or (relapse).
Relapses for me usually occur during quiet moments in time, when I am at peace, I relapse, and when (if) that peace is disturbed, I write. I had a great evening, was journaling and drinking quietly, and then when I spoke talking to myself, someone insulted me not in agreement with me or my methodologies, and insulted me, out of the blue for no reason, I wasn’t even talking to him, I was standing alone, talking to an empty table. Attacks never occur in close quarters, its usually someone comes up to you an insults you, this was the first time this has ever occurred to me.
Its never appropriate to fight with anyone, even upon insult. That is not the strategy toward peace, and that is not the correct response, and almost had to talk to the police that night. I’m instead going to talk to police tomorrow, at coffee in West Hollywood, between 8 and 9 am, if anyone is interested in attending to discuss, alcohol and defamation, and what to do if someone picks a fight with me.
I personally do not have any anger or resentments, but upon people insulting me, then these issues, come out. Instead I am starting therapy on Monday to discuss private issues, with others and about myself, in a private and protected space. That does not cause unreasonable hardship to myself or others. The President just got back from Asia and the Philippines in support of my causes, and really doesn’t have time for negativity right now, from me or others. He cried yesterday to me.
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