The Geling Phase is ONGOING. Delay is NOT due to withholding informative or selectively incorporating information or bits based on how it affects me or others or makes me or others looks, if not mentioned its because its either not an issue for me or because I havent thought of it or because I havent put those pieces together in my mind. I write and as things gel or I see or understand an issue in a different way I share that view or interpretation as I go NOT not talking about anything because I have anything to hide. Ive said it before and Ill say it again I have nothing to hide. I have no secrets. No morally apprehensible past or past behavior. Never perpetrated a crime on another or harmed another to feel satisfied or like Ive won in life, and Ive never had a sexually inappropriate or illegal relationship in my life. I hold Myself to a very high set of moral and ethical standards and behaviors for which are to be socially acceptable and make decisions and choices in life based on whats the best legal, moral, and ethical choice and/or decision for me to make. I care what people think. Always do my best. I dont take criticism lightly always try to better myself. If suicidal IT IS AND ALWAYS HAS BEEN A PRODUCT of rejection, getting dumped, or because I dont feel like Im good enough not smart enough not able to achieve or not achieving and doing as well as I should and due to lack of confidence not feeling capable or made to feel worthless and feel like giving up trying and lonely and tired usually manic or crying depressed or not able to push myself to extremes because my head hurts or Im paranoid or hearing voices going schizophrenic. Im okay now. So happy. Finally the Mental illness disorganization is fading energy levels and focused being restored, after a nervous breakdown takes a tremendous amount if hard work and effort and concentration to see myself the way I saw myself before such and such person came into my life. I am myself again and I feel great!