You can’t go backwards to explain yourself, if not acceptable then then at no future point in time will any positive impressions be made moving forward but a past viewpoint of you as heard by others or by incident preferred to paint a picture of you in their mind that makes sense, that would be by someone in your past who is either being defensive to the illnesses you suffer now, or not wanted to be responsible in the future if you become ill having known you, its to each ones responsible to take care of themselves, you can only blame others for so long until you have to fix your own life, and learn how to live on your own, we cannot be given things in life, if we are not deserving of privileges in life, that includes friends and companions, its important therefore to begin new relationships or end old relationships but not to be judgmental toward those in your past for their current relationships or lack thereof. Some people will think what they want to think and just like offenders or addicts who wont stop, wont stop being boastful of their superiorities in life, and continue to spread gossip about others or about me … to paint a negative picture until they feel admonished of their wrongs towards me, no one is deserving of suicide, not me not anyone, and the only way to defend against such illnesses, is to bear in mind, not all see it coming, that is negativity, and some people when they get hurt self-harm, and sometimes that self-harm hurts the feelings of others or people around them who are trying to help them, that’s not separations to create dysfunction, but we assume to help you function better, not to embarrass you in public on purpose, or to make the voices you experience worse, as real or imagined. Just do your best. Its for no one to judge another in the abstract the purposes for their word choices or the standards of their wellness as based upon care given to them by others, but it usually when we self-care in a way that breeds positivity to fruition in our own lives, and creates energy that others are drawn to, means that we are speaking and behaving appropriately in a positive light to which others are drawn to, that’s not by money or clothes or makeup that’s by being a good person. Once you’ve achieved being a good person, not to forget the people who intervened and tried to help get you back on track along the way, you will be compared to others who have found less than success in recovery, some who have passed, don’t be one of them, be strong, and being strong does not mean action in the literal sense, no time period is so dark or so depressing, or so equivocal, that argument or words are required to fill those spaces or to correct those thoughts about others, share your two cents wisely, and always keep in mind, people have lives of their own, and don’t have the energy to waste going backwards through your past, to help paint a better or bigger picture of the past as a whole as though your connected to a bigger picture, without fame, there is less responsibility influence and leadership wise, but once you put yourself out there to help others, expect criticisms only to strength the kinds of topics you discuss that in the event if needed can help someone through a mental health issue they have experienced along the way either directly or not but not feel alone. On a Personal Note: I am now confiding in a doctor or choice, through the nitty grittys of self harm and why its difficult for me to be trusted now, as someone who has self harmed, that why people get put in hospitals, when tired, do that they can get better not self harm again.
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