Ive been volunteering for Brady United since I left my job in Century City at Bag Fund Inc, where I was awarded a plack upon completing my internship, turned $12/hr job as an Airbnb Housekeeper to a 3 story house on Cashio, we hung out at on weekends after work, my Boss used to love to throw Clippers Parties, and we watched the Manny Pacquiao/Mayweather fight that year, I was a blogger on Twitter at the time, starting out a fashion blogger, obviously was not equipped to compete with the best, but studied a few of them nonetheless, to learn the ropes about affiliate marketing, signed up for shopstyle, applied, and was approved, and also added my blogs to bloglovin, and was scouted by sassique.com on tumblr to join their fashion blogging network. Its difficult to make money online, but I suppose if you love to model and have a big enough following, posting a few links to outfits every now and then cant hurt to acquire those professional relationships in life, to further your career. Early on as a blogger, I was lacking purpose, which later changed, the more I decided to get involved and try volunteering for various organizations and learning about how others have contributed to causes to which I felt personally affected by as a law student, and wanted to learn about what I could do to help, its mostly by showing up, donating, and volunteering your time to be apart of that makes all the difference, that’s your support group, whether their support was sufficient time enough to help you through those difficult years coping with the news, they were there when no one else was, that’s a start, they seem to be tacking on additional campaigns to their primary agendas, as they have been similarly affected by suicide, via gun violence (we’re talking about Brady United). Last year, I remember getting a text from a student on the board at Team Enough, as a law student, I felt super senior talking to a high school student, kind of reminds me of Kindergarten buddies in elementary school at Carlthorp School (where Ben Affleck’s daughter went, Violet), and we were discussing what we do, and what our interests are, and when asked about my life, I had mentioned that mental health issues, were a big deal me, not just as I have experienced them, but felt that as a volunteer and while being concerned about gun violence, caring has had a dramatic effect on my mental health, that’s beyond the pressure of school, work, and life skills issues (i.e laundry, paying bills, affording the costs of living, medical bills), which has required me to not only be sober, but to be apart of, attend AA meetings at HIW (with Jonah Hill shhh), get a sponsor in West Hollywood (because I’m not brave enough to be Gay, my sponsor who is Bi, seems to be a perfect match for me, we both had two companions at the same time, and freaked out, I was choosing between someone I met at a Bar on Wilshire 2013, who Ive seen on and off for years, and someone new, older, who I have a lot in common with, I decided to date someone new for a change, I wasn’t sure what to call my other relationship, he prefers not to be spoken about online, and I can respect that). Im sure Im not the only one who feels like 2013 to now was a blur, that was the worst PTSD I think our Country has ever experienced, Im glad the fog is lifting now, I’m sad for those who are not here to experience the lifting of the fog, we all go through it, not every day is the same, and some days I wonder if others feel like the day is long, or short, I hope someone is keeping track of our progress, Im pretty sure that’s the beauty of blogging, looking back, and witnessing all the transitions you go through, like a bookshelf of experiences, you file away a piece of you one bit at a time, and low and behold a whole series of changes evolves in you, and you get to be apart of that positive change others experience having known you, and believing in you. Its hard to keep up with the times, theres so much to read, I have instead chose to free read, through this phase in life, and keep up less with whats on TV, Ive found that I have achieved more stability, keeping busy, than keeping track of everything current, its not a complete loss, but should do better job of keeping up with whos famous now, so many new faces, so many names, and I have no idea whos who, that would be something to learn considering that I am working in the film industry now, it would be good to know, the whos who of film, Im sure there are courses, beyond just the name game, connecting first and last names, that’s all I know. -Today was interesting, we sat behind the Moms Demand booth, I used to volunteer for their leader, and bumped into someone from my home group in West Hollywood, and we all chatted with the booth next to us, a recovery center, who invited me to speak at H&I Panels, similarly UCLA had me sign an agreement and asked me if I would be willing to speak. -It couldn’t be calmer right now, but we are reminded to “never forget” I think that’s to keep us going in life, not to bring us down, that no matter where we go from here, those experiences will always be apart of us, let just pray for those who are still suffering that they will still be here for this moment of peace and future moments of peace, its sad not to have them around. -Beautiful turn out today at #outofthedarkness, I'm glad I went. Thank you @afspnational "American Foundation for Suicide Prevention" and everyone for all that you do! #stopsuicide
Some people, no one wants to be grouped among that statement, as though they are some kind of lesser species of human, not in the know, or within any inner circles of thoughts, or rumor, it seems that a shared understanding would be in ways that protect the integrity more so of those spoken about posing more risks to the character as read or looked at if youre the one speaking or telling an account from your life, it just so happens that it’s the teller of stories, usually someone who is told not to play victim, if they complain, or share a story to empower themselves, wind up empowering those spoken about and feeling less powerful, the exact opposite of their intentions which is to feel uplifted and to uplift others, via the sharing of their story, to someone who understands this concept, to see someone try and fail, is just that, obvious, but not in anyway empowering, instead as a whole, both sides should focus on the concepts being brought forward through the sharing of a story, and how to better the delivery of those concepts, maybe theres a better way, there usually is, in making a point, its only until after all is said and done, sometimes you wish you would have lived life differently, or done a better job overall, as an outline, taking action and making progress in life, but who does that outlines their goals in life, and accomplishes those goals in the exact order that they intend to achieve those goals in life, sometimes its not until failure, we become forced to set goals for ourselves, because we don’t have any structure to our lives, because that damage to that part of our lives is irrecoverable, because those moments in time, cannot be corrected, and because no amount of rights can undo those wrongs or failures in life, to play victim, would just be throwing more energy into the wheel of power, giving and taking, losing, and winning, and ultimately finding ourselves drained once again, in the same ways we once tricked ourselves into feeling sick and convincing ourselves we were ill, as others were convinced that we were, be suddenly blame outside causes and conditions, for our present state if we are unhappy with where we are, and its that blaming of others that causes us to feel ill, and it’s the playing victim while blaming others, that causes others to feel on edge around us, as though we are the ones not to be trusted, or as though we are the ones who are unstable not living life accordingly, and as a default to our own choices in life are suffering, physically, financially, emotionally, socially, academically, and professionally, how long will you allow that cycle of blame to continue before you allow yourself to move forward regardless whos fault it is that you became ill, you have to take responsibility for your choices, and the more bad choices you can eliminate from your life, the fewer opportunities for failure stand in the way from you recovering from those injuries in life, to your well being, image, and ability to improve, everyone deserves to help themselves in life, not all should be dependent upon others for all things worth living for, to some degree we have to want to live for ourselves, and if you so much hate yourselves for whatever reasons no one else cares about your hardships in life, than your care for your own well being should naturally keep you motivated in life, and whatever helps keep you going in life, if not for others, or with the support from others, eventually at some point, like in meditation your mind frees itself of thoughts, and when you are living, eventually, that dependency upon others is lifted and you are again just you in yourself, living for you, and doing what you are doing to be doing something to be normal to live life, and to function and to feel apart of, accepted, valuable, and in the moment, don’t we all crave that, to feel in the moment, not behind in life, or without others lonely, no one deserves to hurt so bad that they don’t feel like living anymore, no amount of rejections, shocking or not, or hope lifted and then brought down to disappointment, any wave on the spectrum of happiness or roller coaster of life, should be so unmanageable as to take our own lives, that would be tantrumming and giving up in life and no one wants to see that, how come we can be both the helper and the victim, and when we feel we are the victim feel like we don’t get any help, even the help that does come our way, fail to acknowledge likewise the value of that help given, think about it, when you become unhappy with everything at your disposal to succeed, would be an insult to those who care cared and will care about you if you are no longer here, its important to live life, its important to have faith, its important to recover from whats hurting you, its important to not be alone and whats more important is to help again, why? If you help better than you are able to receive help, than chances are if you become victim, as independent it will be difficult for you to ask for help when help is needed, and if those problems persist and you do not cope in healthy ways, are likely to stumble upon unhealthy attachments, or uses of substances, to quell those feelings bottled up, or brought out of you, which you feel the need to suppress, as a means to feel normal. If you are self-medicating without the help of a physician its likely you need professional help, we mostly only hurt ourselves when we try to remedy or mostly over-remedy whats hurting, beyond the point of feeling good, that’s called addiction, not all are like this but some. If you are both the victim and the helper, or just the helper or a victim but not yet a helper, it may not be easy to help others immediately, and like DBSA Support Alliance offers trainings for how to help others, similarly, I was trained for 40 hours to be a crisis hotline counselor, so smash those plans, stop worrying what other people think, don’t go back through the negative thinking to explain how or why you got sick, its okay everytime I tell my own story I get suicidal, go figure that must be Gods way of saying, is the story inside you? Yes. Does that story inside you hurt? Yes. Have you been able to move forward and achieve a new life and happiness? Yes. Well then chances are even if you cant see it, going back through it, will hurt again, so be careful not to rehash old emotions, that not even a 10 mile run can cure, where you wind up feeling alone, taunted, not gonna make it, after you’ve already made it to a new relationship, give up, ask for 2 weeks, after the first date, after 5 months, after dating 2 months, bring yourself down thinking the thoughts of others as you told your story past or presently rehash your story and again think the same thoughts you thought before others had, while having the same reactions again, except now, after having moved forward, be brought backwards, that’s casting the lure to be bitten by others, and then getting rallied up over feelings, that would have not been had or thought of had you not casted a lure out to be viewed by others, trying to provide a source of empowerment online, be sure that by speaking in a general way, neither you nor others are harmed by your feelings, nor are others then able to read into your story, and for you likewise to hear their thoughts, or have your thoughts be hurt by the concepts drawn from your stories, that others hear, after having met you or listened to you, or by knowing who youre attached to, dating, or were friends with, we are not our attachments, our chemical makeup, and genetics are worthless when it comes to mental health, star athlete to bipolar, who designed humans anyways, to be so gifted after working hard or training, or by education, be so easily dismantled, and disabled, and put to sleep on the daily, until they don’t want to live anymore, who convinces someone that the voices they hear mean they should be disabled physically so that they cant run, why is it my fault if I hear voices, and why are those voices mean to me? What is it about my story that justifies any voice from arguing that I am at fault for my own condition now, and why do I feel like dying when I hear negative feedback, not existing in reality but in my own head, whats causing that to happen again, why is support so important? In IOP doing well, after IOP the real world, whats the problem? Less abilify, Id rather be able to run and write, whats more abilify? I don’t feel like working, and sleeping at 8pm. Not driven in life, have I ever caused harm to the intelligences of others? No everyone is successful around me, do you know anyone else who has been hospitalized? No. Do you know why you are hurting? No. Do you think that the hurt is deserved? What voices? No. Whos fault is that? ( Example: + vs. - thinking at the end).
Usually when we post, we post with enthusiasm, hoping to equally lift those around us, having read something that we have shared, however that is not always the case. Sometimes when we post too much, this can cause worry to others, regarding your health, condition, and frame of mind, bringing into question your stability and fitness of character. Those who work hard offline, are usually not questioned to the same extent as those who work hard online, with all the stages of their progress, per every assignment viewable to onlookers. You cannot easily watch the progress of others, if they don’t share out loud, their stages of wellness along the way, throughout their journey, that is the beauty of blogging, sharing our stages in life. For some blogging is a stepping stone in life: “Many bloggers go on to lead successful lives, both as movers and shakers in their respective industries.”  According to shoutmeloud.com “Professional blogging implies lots of responsibilities and lots of discipline.”  How much of your work online, translates to your work ethic in a desk job, or other work from home jobs, can your experience working online, set you aside from the other candidates in a good way, or does having an independent career as a writer hurt your chances of being hired, along the way. Based on my own experiences, not holding steady jobs for 1 year or more has hurt my chances of being hired, set aside as “#3” to other applicants being interviewed, because why I have not been in a steady job was difficult to explain, after having left an internship to finish my dissertations to my graduate degree which was put on hold several times, while blogging, and trying to write a book, which has not yet been published, to me it seems unless you have the hours on paper, and paychecks to prove that you have worked, can work, and are a hard worker, then and only then can it be proven that you are hirable to work full-time or even on a part-time basis, otherwise, your demonstration of independent savy as a blogger online, or someone who cares about causes, and draws awareness by volunteer work or shared posts online with hashtags, does less than an adequate job of selling you to your future employer, who may not be all together convinced that youre right for the part. Today I talked about bipolar on squares on my personal blog on Instagram.com/fischman.leslie, Ive had so many blogs and taken down so many blogs, that my name is now backwards on one of my main accounts, I have three, one for writing, one for pictures of me, and one account private to follow my friends on, that I added (I think for the purposes of privacy, maintaining some confidentiality as to your contacts in life, really makes a difference, one reason why I have not accepted friend requests from strangers, but made a second Facebook account to manage pages on, and use daily, that doesn’t require me to check on my friends everyday or view newsfeeds by them, Im not sure whether that was a wise decision on my part, theyre not my competition, which I need to turn a blind eye to, but a reality check point, I should’ve participated more, in positive ways, not just to chain mail post them my bipolar episodes along the way, they were in essence my DBSA Ambassadors, its actually the other way around, in most respects, others being a source of normal during bipolar phases in life, just because you know these people, doesn’t mean that they aren’t as inspirational as other famous people coming up in the world -Are they married? Yes. Do they have jobs? Yes. Do they have friends and social lives? Yes. And how do you know all of this? Because they post on Facebook photos from their journeys along the way. Do you ever worry about them? No. How do you think they feel seeing you throughout the years? Probably difficult to talk to. Are they talking to you now? Yes. What has changed since your last bipolar episode sharing? I stopped posting as much. Why did you stop posting as much? Because I was in IOP and working on the last few pages of my dissertation I wrote with a broken hand Spring 2019, because my Occupational Therapist says she finished her Dissertation in 2 Weeks, took time off work then to finish her Masters, so I was inspired to research and type my Dissertation, while my hand was healing, something to do, to keep me feeling up, while my hand was in and out of a cast, before and after surgery, fractured my hand. And why did you fracture your hand? Because I had no friends, was messengering with a Trump account, out of touch with reality, and super defensive and paranoid, staying in my room, thinking that my position in life, was inescapable, low energy, really insecure, couldn’t take a good photo if my life depended on it, and writing to preserve the best of me. Sometimes, through disciplined activities, we do just that preserve the best of us, when all hell breaks lose, and instability occurs in our lives, that is our center, what keeps us going in life, what can be relied upon, and what we can be relied upon in life, feeling needed, and at the same time of use to others, why blogging was a great outlet for me as a law student. Its not codependency (writer : following), as you can see I blog less, but my alexa rank skyrocketed this year, and weebly following, so much so, that they changed the metrics from which they total the number of visits and views you get to a google standard of analytics, which is now in the hundreds not the thousands as they once reported to me. Is that why you stopped blogging as much? No. I thought that being better correlated with blogging less, and that blogging more, correlated with others thinking less of me, and that when others think less of me, I hear more voices and don’t do as well emotionally, and mentally, more symptomatic. Exactly how did things start going right for you in life, cant anyone just finish IOP after the required 6 weeks? I guess so, what made your recovery so special, that you were asked to maybe speak in the future if they needed you? Because she stated that that was the “fastest recovery” shes seen “ever.” Low and behold I have an imaginary fan club online, who I feel supported by, and who supports me, whether or not I blog, and when I do blog, remembers me, and supports me. To me, that’s being a successful blogger, not required to keep up with your audience, but has an audience that unconditionally follows you, checks on you, recalls your work, and reads.
 Id at 1.
Today is the day, we ask for forgiveness, in the Jewish Faith, a day of atonement. What does Yom Kippur  mean to me? It means thinking about all the times I have been frustrated in life, over the past year, and thinking about everything positive I have done for myself to make progress in life. It reminds me to be thankful for all my blessings in life, and to remember, to always work hard, and to never take my anger or frustrations out on others let alone myself, and not self-harm. ~Tomorrow’s my last day of IOP at UCLA, was hospitalized in August. Life may be short but that doesn’t mean that you need to make life more difficult for yourself, adding the pressures on time to your plate, just live every day to the fullest, not like its your last. Today we are reminded not to overindulge ourselves in lifes pleasures, much like those who stop drinking, because of the selfish character attributes it brings out in us, so does the need for pleasure bring out the worst in us too. Whether its in relationships, not getting enough attention, or out of jealousy worry when attentions are not on us, experience fear of loss, those are all selfish attributions of the need for pleasure. You cannot begin a new relationship and you cannot start a new life, if everything needs to be about you, or if everything about you, is keeping you from living life among others, also have compassion for the lives that they lead, and acceptance of the fact that everyone has problems. -I learned in IOP that the difference between feelings and thoughts, are that feelings are one word, and thoughts are more than one word, and while we cannot change our feelings, we can change our thinking about the way we feel. According to Jen Sincero quoting Wallace Wattles in You Are a Badass …,  “You created the reality you now exist in with your thoughts, which means you can use the very same power of thought to change it.” (page 93) She then goes on to state that: “if you want to change your reality, you have to change your beliefs.” Doing this is as easy as changing I can’t statements to I can, and I will never, to thoughts of possibilities in the future. (page 140) Don’t limit yourself by your feelings in life, sometimes our immediate needs, are acceptance in order to grow from those feelings and move forward past those thresholds of pain, sorrow, regret, embarrassment, and face those losses of self. We will encounter many emotions throughout our lives, its you at the end of the day that needs to be able to live with yourself, "love yourself" (page 133), and be able to utilize the tools necessary to handle those feelings and emotions as they arise, not giving in to “sin” as the Jewish Faith would call it, to be angry, or throw fits, or even tantrum in response to any discussions that do not feed your ego or need to be right in life, you wont always be right, and sometimes you have to allow others to be right to, replies Jen Sincero, (page 125) even if allowing others to be right, is not in alignment with your need to be right or how you see things.
The only person you should be competing against in life when it comes to wellness is yourself. Its at that point, of not feeling well, that you have to put your best interests first, making your own wellness a priority, irrespective of how well others are doing around you, sounds selfish, but in the immediate, comparing yourself to others wellness, will only make you feel worse off, or by recognizing what is not going right for you in life, feeling less than others wellness wise. Do not compare your worst to the best versions of others, everyone reaches their point of normalcy at their own paces in life, we are not all together perfect at all times, everyone struggles. Just do your best, to blend in, whether that’s functioning in public normally, or speaking to others without bringing them down, that’s the best way to be cognizant of the health of others, not affect them by your downs in life, even if in the immediate you cannot comprehend recognizable comparisons others viewing you may see. That’s not your responsibility to control what others think, or to be judged by others, based upon the progress you have made, be seen as someone who is behind in life, or could’ve achieved more, had they been more focused, everyone is on their own timing in life, and on that note sometimes your timing is not to the best timing of others, that you have to let go of, that’s when forgiveness kicks in and you move forward in life, we may not all be here forever, but that doesn’t mean don’t value and appreciate those around you in your life, while everyone is still here, I’m glad that for the most part, we have found better ways of coping with losses, and not losing ourselves over those losses in life. Its okay to feel sad, its okay to feel embarrassed, its okay to feel down, its okay to feel defeated, its okay to feel depressed, its okay to think that everyone is judging you, its okay for you to be judging others, its okay to add humor to your life, its okay to smile, its okay to laugh, its okay to try to fit in, its okay to pay attention to trends, its okay to make mistakes, its okay to love others, its okay to lose friends, its okay to leave jobs, its okay to find new jobs, its okay to maintain contacts, its okay to have friends, its okay to share in public your feelings, its okay to change, its okay to grow, its okay to notice patterns, its okay to have delusions, its okay to freak out, its okay to see things wrong, its okay to be wrong, and its okay to question yourself sometimes, we don’t always have the right answers to our problems, and that’s okay, whats most important is learning how to deal with your symptoms, and get the help that you need so that your symptoms don’t worsen, that’s the main point. The longer you leave things off to resolve themselves, the harder it becomes to start managing those issues one by one, as you try to get better, and overcome those setbacks or difficulties in life, that’s what hardships are all about, learning when to stop moving backwards and when to move forwards, when to forgive, when to let go, and when the silent treatment becomes unbearable, when to rise above, you cant always measure your own self-worth based upon how others feel about you, then you’d spend the majority of your time waiting for acceptances from others, to feel whole, or to feel apart of, its okay to live life, and allow life to catch up to you, its not necessary to catch up with everyone, or to have people in your life, right now, to feel needed or of value, one should value themselves, before needing to be valued by others, that’s not a right, to be valued by others, and if you are feeling lost that’s not the time to test your value in life.
"God helps those who help themselves" quoting my Dad.
At a certain point, when getting to know someone new, or when thinking about someone who you used to know well, and feel distant from … you stop expecting change, and learn to accept the spaces between you and others, at some points in life, things become less intimate, and people become more focused on themselves, their goals in life, and where they are headed, regardless of whether you are doing well or not, wish the best for you, but at this time, choose to be separate from you. That goes for all relationships, not just romantic ones. Friendships, never die, you can always rely on those who once cared for you to be there during your up moments, and reply. And those who are new to your life, don’t be surprised if they expect more of you, or if they challenge you to try harder in life, that’s not that theyre not being accepting of you, but maybe its just that they see your potential, that you’ve lost track of along the way. -Some mental health issues, don’t come and go, some stay, and some symptoms either worsen or not depending on how well you follow instructions, and advices given along the way, some problems corrected, lets hope we don’t make the same mistakes in life more than once, that’s a lot of loss to suffer in one lifetime, reliving the same mistakes over and over again, and expecting different results, you would be kidding yourself, if you thought you could have your way in life, hurting self, and at your expense hurting others, causing them to be distant toward you. Self-harming and addictive behaviors is much about happiness with yourself, when youre not happy with yourself, youre more likely to make bad choices in life, when left to your own devices, isolation is your worst enemy during times of need, that’s actually when you need to step out of your shell and be around others, that’s when you learn the most about yourself, either rising to the occasion of wellness, or forgoing all opportunities to move forward in life, and choosing to stick to your old patterns of coping that don’t seem to resolve those empty feelings causing you to be alone, it’s a choice to be alone, don’t choose to be alone, choose to be around people, and once you make that choice to be around people, don’t expect people to openly want to be close to you, until you have become more well adjusted to your environment and being around others, especially if you have mental health issues, its easy to be timid, to not ask for help, to shy away from love and friendships, that makes sense, not wanting to get hurt again, or not wanting to risk the potential for loss along the way, as you get better. Know that you are fine just the way you are, keep working on yourself, and allow the rest to fall into place. The more you try to better yourself, the more you will attract the type of companionships in life you think you deserve or want to have in life, the less you try, and shy away from progress putting yourself down, the less likely you will be to move forward, give yourself a chance first to move forward, and really try to improve, those genuine attachments you have toward bettering yourself, in the activities you choose to engage in, the more you will attract people into your life, who may or may not be similarly situated but you choose to better themselves on a daily basis as well, its not that similar people attract similar people, its that busy people, who have lives of their own, not dependent upon others are easier to be around, without worry, be one of them, not someone to worry about, or for them to have fear about the risks of losing you to mental health issues, that’s why they say its selfish to self-harm and that its all about seeking attentions from others, because behaviorally at your discomforts cause others to become uncomfortable and as a result may cause others to focus on you, not for what you are doing right in life, but to seek help by communicating your illness in a way that forces them to have to care, not because they necessarily want to care, that’s not the way to go about starting or ending relationships, based upon how much attention is paid toward you, then blaming one or the other for lack of attentions causing you to self-harm, that’s not the solution to dealing with breakups and losses, that usually just pushes people further away from you in life. It takes time to love yourself, and to live life freely, free of fear, without worry about your health, and without worry over potential losses to face in the future, when connecting with others, that’s not what connecting is about. If you expect every connection to be long term, well you are only setting yourself up for heartache and heartbreak, take it day by day in those cases, you cannot expect to have the confidence of someone who has been well and who has been able to avoid illness in life, and see yourself as less tough by comparison, mental health issues, may not be contagious, but you certainly should not compare yourself to others, who haven’t exhibited the same symptoms or exemplified a condition, that you have had to endure throughout your blogging career, most things dealt with in private, are usually resolved in private so that in public, others do not have to witness them upset, disgruntled, or feeling down in the dumps, who walks around sulking, for attentions, exactly, that would be weird, Im sure not all mental health issues, are purposefully exuded in public, sometimes unless anyone points out to us what needs work, we continue on that way without change, there are ways to think more positively about yourself, to get to more positive end results, you just have to stay conscious of what needs work, in order to fix what needs work, everyone is different, “everyone has problems,” and know that youre not alone. If there is any advice I could give to someone who is still struggling with mental health issues, it would be to follow your Doctor’s advice, take your medications as directed, get your sleep at night, don’t oversleep, and set an alarm wake up early, and slowly craft a schedule for yourself to follow each day, until the days feel less long, time moves by quicker, and the days feel more complete, having accomplished things and by keeping yourself busy. Its hard to transition to the real world, if you don’t have your basic life skills down, and have not adjusted to your meds, and able to keep a schedule, not all are blessed with jobs in life, and some of us have to battle our mental health issues, not just our demons in sobriety, some issues are better not discussed out loud in public, that includes self-identifying characteristics or traits, or personal histories, that set you off as being less than according to social standings, if you want to have a job that your proud of having, a companion your proud of being with, and a life your proud to have lived, than start accepting those moments when you did not have your condition under control, and hope that as you continue to improve others will become more accepting of you, your past, and where you are now.
Appreciate the smaller milestones in life. Whether its losing a few pounds, setting a new fitness regimen, attending AA meetings, dating, hanging out with friends, making new friends, chatting with friends on Messenger, finishing an assignment, applying for a new job, starting a new job, these are all examples of steps in the right direction. Never stop living life, and if you have to blog in between phases in life, that’s okay too. My new Alexa Rank puts my website in the top 147,126K Websites in the US! What was once a hobby has the potential to become a career choice later in life, if I so choose to guest post blog, get paid for writing and publish a book. Right now I’m focused on finishing my Dissertation and graduating from Law School, with an LLM Masters in Law, studying Money Laundering and AML Laws in the US and UK, Finance. The purpose of getting a Masters was to get a job, and the purpose of blogging was to keep going in spite of not having a job, just need to be sure to mention my experience on my resume, but not sure where to start. What was once a quotes campaign on Twitter and Instagram, has turned into a blog on Weebly, with updates to friends on Facebook and Twitter. Your blogging career evolves overtime, writing less on social media platforms, and writing more on your own on your own website. Eventually you guest post blog. I just joined Need to Live (Link: https://theneedtolive.com/?aff=36), and look forward to my first post on their website.
Goal setting, why is it so important to goal set? While there are many blogs to help you “reach your life’s goals”  we are not all bloggers, so how do we reach our potential, if we are just trying to get good at one thing in life, such as work or a relationship? [Step One] A lot of blogging requires you to first have a good “relationship you have with yourself.”  If you want to get a new job, if you want to guest post blog, and if you want to have a career doing what you love most, then you need to first improve your self-esteem. Its important to note that, “Self-esteem is enhanced when you set a goal that’s meaningful and important to you, and you follow through to make it happen.”  For example, I have been setting running goals for myself, exercising daily, this is to help lose weight, to be more presentable. When I was told at my last job, that I could lose a few pounds, put back on adderrall sent to a new doctor, I was mortified, not insulted, but used to being bossed around at that point in my life [an introvert], and subjected myself to that heartache of not feeling good enough. Don’t be insulted, get active, the more prepared you are in advance, and the better you feel about yourself, the less you look like a project to someone else, who is in need of fixing. [Step Two] Know Yourself and be sure to set “SMART [goals] (specific, measureable, attainable, relevant and time-bound) goals that motivate you and write them.”  [Step Three] Be sure to set mini goals and reward yourself along the way,  think about what needs to get done in order to achieve a bigger goal ie getting a job, or guest post blogging, and [Step Four] get prepared to achieve that goal, when the time comes, performing under pressure is so important to feeling good about yourself, not only are you able to rise to occasions, but you leave a lasting impression upon others, that you can be relied upon, and trusted during times of need, an important quality to have in the work force in todays setting. [Step 5] And lastly know your limits, pace yourself, don’t set goals that are too difficult to achieve or set your standards too high of yourself, that you fail to measure up, if you have been able to achieve in past, then pat yourself on the back, your personal history helps mold you into who you become in the future, learn to love yourself, recognize your mistakes in life, and move forward so that you can begin a new life, if you have not looked back, chances are if you move forward without correcting what has gone wrong in the past, will leave you feeling lost yet again, unsuccessful in any attempts to start a new job, relationship, or expand your skill set career wise, its okay to invest time in bettering yourself, you deserve that much!
Steps to Goal Setting:
 Id at 2.
Growing up, things don’t generally hit you until later in life, when your young you more readily adapt to the present, without thinking too much about the past, and without worry for your future. The pressure to succeed hits you later in life, and its then you assess where you have been, and with consideration for your upbringing, do your best to represent yourself and others well, this does not come easy to most, an overwhelming fear of anxiety sometimes takes hold of you, everything at stake, what has passed, what has been lost, and where to go to from here, the more stability you are able to achieve throughout your years in life, the better opportunities present themselves to you later in life, its all about focus and perseverance. For some its easy to brush aside the problems of those who are not successful, as not being of importance, or a story worth hearing, and even worse if you have mental health issues, then no one want to read your story out of fear that their issues may be triggered by your understandings of life, based off of your experiences and what you’ve been through in life. There is a sense of possessiveness, others feel in terms of their own health, and that will never change, the less you try to convince others to accept you, the less worry and fear youll allow to take hold of your interpretations in life, and how well you feel about yourself, the opinions of others, should not matter to you, benefit not impede upon your progress and understanding of the world, there is no remedy or special information that can be provided to those who think they have life all figured out, stubborn and resentful toward those who they think should not be suffering from mental health issues, had they not had a problem with drugs and alcohol, and therefore do not see them as victim ever to their problems, but the cause of their own failures in life, its sympathies from those, you should refrain from questioning, in life, and your time is better spent bettering yourself, with or without those types of people in your life, you don’t need forgiveness to move forward, and you don’t need to step down to those who think they are better than you, to feel apart of, all you need to do is be able to exist in the present, without feeling sudden bouts of depression, ignore negative voices and opinions of you, and not self-harm to any of those opinions of you, they’ll likely turn a blind eye, and again blame you for your own sufferings in life, no one who is in non-acceptance of you ever takes responsibility for how they may have made you feel about yourself, when you have been worse off, in life, its their own lives that matter more to them, maybe not even having an opinion of your life that you can yet understand, perspectives change overtime, and your perspective of yourself, and where your at in life, can likely change to, the more progress you make. Don’t ever compare your sense of self, to the sense of self others have achieved, in order to have things in life, not all who are well are blessed with certain amenities in life, that help to establish their sense of feeling successful and above others, its all about where they see themselves, as compared to where they have been, and have a clear awareness of where they are headed in life, wanting to live long lives, if you have suffered and have considered ending your life, then you will not feel like most people, and doors wont begin to open back up for you in life, until you learn to value yourself, and again realize your potential in life, taking it one day at a time, until you are able to see weeks, and months in front of you, and even years, then and only then, is it safe to try and be social again, but isolating is never the solution, be mindful of those who have given up on you in life, some don’t want to be blamed for your mental health issues, and that’s probably why they are no longer in your lives, to live better lives, without having to suffer the repercussions of being connected to someone who is not doing well in life.
As you get older, feeling more and more pressed for time, you begin to re-organize your life, your livelihood depends upon this, being able to work, being able to feel apart of, and giving back to others, as others have given opportunities to you, to get well, feeling like it’s a good idea to help others, once you get well, know that this doesn’t all happen at once. There are phases in life, when you need help, and there are phases in life when you are able to provide help to others. No matter what boat youre in, know that youre not alone. We don’t all become advocates at once, and sometimes you have to learn many lessons before you are able to help and give advisement to those who are struggling how to get out of a bind in life, or navigate through all the suffering and hardships, of not having a job. “Life is tough, but so are you” is the quote. That really rings true in your 30s, making friends, losing friends, and the risk of losing family, is ever more present, all the times your Mom used to say “while we’re still around” begins to knock on your door, and where are you at in life at that point, at a point of hardship, or at a point of success, at a point of clarity, or in ruins, where do you want to be in life, when those bigger life lessons come knocking on your door, are you fearless, are you cognizant, are you compassionate, are you being self-centered, are you focused on the right things in life, or are you focused on meaningless things such as image and weight, what matters to you moving forward, how are you spending your time on this earth, and are you living a meaningful life. Although some may consider you a waste of time or space, know that you matter, whether or not you happen to be on anyones good side, or on their bad side, over the life you have lived, know that you will always have potential to live a meaningful life if you so choose to. Know that in your 30s “Looking back, some of my biggest failures that seemed so catastrophic at the time, feel meaningless.”  Its important to get going and to keep going in life. Once you stop, settling for “a sedentary lifestyle”  and choose to overcome your mental health issues, that’s one positive step in the right direction, to begin goal setting again, and “do it now if at all possible”  and stop procrastinating, such as putting off a dissertation, to work, or making excuses for not showing up to events, causes, or meetups in life, or dates, because you are feeling inadequate or not good enough in life, life was meant to be lived, and you cannot start living life, unless you take active steps to keep moving in life, whether that’s forward, on under controlled circumstances go backwards in therapeutic settings. -If you blog in between jobs, or outside of work, remember one thing: “Don't slave away … thinking it's for some sort of greater good and that you will be greatly rewarded some time in the future. Unless there is actual, measurable benefit for you in putting in so many hours, [your future is] not going to happen. Nobody thanks you in the end, and you'll just burn out.”  So true, unless you have goals along the way while building a blog for yourself, to share your life you need to: (1) Have a life (2) Live life with positive purpose (3) Share the meaning behind your experiences in life how they have helped shaped you (4) and How will blogging benefit your future potential to get jobs, or to find a career in writing, or something related to your work online, if you haven’t figured out that much yet, (5) Write a book, put it to the side, finish your dissertation, and apply for jobs! You can always come back to what work has been finished and improve upon it at a later point in time, what you cant do, is go backwards and fill in the gaps in your resume, why its important to keep working, and if necessary continue your education, so that you can keep applying for jobs, and have something to show for yourself, during your time away from work or school.
 Id at 1.
 Id at 1.
 Id at 1.
Hearing stories of heartbreak, its easy to become desensitized, if not feeling the same way about things, to think that someone is being overly dramatic. That’s one defense to the depressions faced by others, to not be affected, and find ourselves in the same shoes, having read their accounts, trials, and tribulations in regards to their own love and acceptance needs in life, must we all feel the same, in order to be understood, sometimes sharing less, being less vocal about our troubles, can lead to better results support wise, rather than turn others away, by our displays, whether dramatic or not to their tastes, if real, we can only therefore be ourselves. We are not all actors, its impossible to be someone acceptable to all, not all are forgiving of our dispositions in life, if not all together normal, may pass judgments upon us, as to why we are the way we are, how we could be better or different, and what in their minds would make us seem more acceptable. That’s not always our fault, how digestable our content is as related to our own lives and connections, as viewed by others. Some would rather have it be that they are glad they are not you, than to feel like they wish they were you, convince themselves of everything wrong with you, to prevent them from feeling, less than or inadequate, by comparison to you and your strengths in life, not all our strengths in life will be viewed upon in aw, or with total non-judgmental acceptance, you cannot expect to be everyones favorite in life, no one is ever quite Americas sweetheart, seems like the competition for the top spot, continues on, whether measured by wealth, self-esteem, accolades, generosity, intelligences, successes, social graces, photo wise, or by just how they make us feel being around them, or hearing from them, I think everyone is doing their best at this point in time, to make everyone feel at home. -Don’t make people feel sorry for you in life, that’s not a careful road to empowerment, don’t bring everyone else down, just because things aren’t going your way in life, but don’t be so hard headed as to think that you have what it takes to represent others, in ways that others have not already done so, its not always your place to be a source of that home feeling, best you can do is to be yourself, and allow people to pick and choose from whom to hear from, and by who’s best words support their best thoughts, and leave feelings up to your audience to decide what helps, and what does anyone a disservice in life to know about, why its important to share less about your troubles, to be well liked, you have to love yourself, and to love yourself, you have to keep busy, and to keep busy, you have to be happy from each point you leave off from, that’s maintaining positive momentum, and its that positive momentum you carry forward, and your aura, well that’s a reflection of all things encompassing, being a good person, a wise decision maker, kind at heart, one that looks out for others, and when seen, all those qualities about them can be felt, similarly leaving at ease others, who otherwise may not have been at ease, or feel better having known you.
Its usually not until after you speak, that greater acceptances of you are achieved, everyone holds their own standards of who to speak to and who not to speak to, based upon their beliefs of what well is. It is by your own wellness, and ability to speak, or articulate yourself, that you are respected in society, that will never change, and if someone is so disinterested in you so as not to speak to you, then allow that space to take place, its not your responsibility to be spoken to by everyone, that doesn’t always indicate whether you are a likeable person overall based upon individual acceptances of you granted. If some do not reply, that is simply because they do not believe in you, or likewise have interpreted your past as described in the negative, thinking that you bear guilt, or knowingly by who you are, have insulted others, by existing in life, everyone has the right to exist in real life, and everyone has the right to exist online, your existence should not change or alter the opinions of others, and by existing online, one should still be able to maintain rights to privacy, regarding their current condition, and conditions past, are not for public knowledge, especially not to benefit the negative judgments held of an individual to whom they do not think is deserving of respect, a job, or a companion, those are they who think an individual did not accurately represent themselves, and in doing so, did not accurately represent others, and if that much can be proven, than any later negative judgments of them help to improve that hatred toward them as though deserved, that’s not always the case. Anyone who so willingly comes forward and asks for help, is not at fault, anyone who so willingly presents themselves to others, is not at fault, anyone whos condition is altered or made worse, is not responsible for their own health, and anyone who is doing their best to stay well, and not interfere with the good health of others is not at fault. If every joke was a joke on you, then you would understand my position, that’s not the purposes for lawsuits, to publicly shame a person, to a suicidal condition, or draw overall inferences of them, as being detestable by societys standards, that’s trying to justify suit, by later bringing about a worse condition of someone, or to promulgate further insight as to their standards of care of themselves, as being justified as causing their own conditions in life, that is to free from blame those who do not like, or think poorly of a person, no I am not responsible for my suicide attempts, and no I am not responsible for what other people think, and no I am not responsible for the acts of others, responding to the conditions of others, via public displays, and no I do not think it is fair to be made fun of, based upon movies, or tv shows, hating on someone who has yet to achieve a career in life, and has yet to be able to earn a living in life, I do not think my chances of survival should be limited based upon what inferences can be drawn based upon what is shown in public, as related to my condition, or the condition of others, which has been further exacerbated by embarrassment, due to an inability to respond to any unforeseen public ridicule that may have resulted, from admiring a person in public, or stating who I am dating in public, or writing about such circumstances in public, that’s for no one to judge why my relationships do not work out, or why I have been separated from my friends, forced to represent myself in life, without their help, or via discussion with them, of what other people think. It is not my responsibility to guide discussions about me, without me being present, it is my responsibility however to live life, and to not further misrepresent myself or others, and do my best to be a positive touchstone, in life, not someone, who everyone sees, and thinks poorly of, that’s in regards to my ability to manage my mental health issues, and not become famous, as apart of, but to achieve on my own, without assistance or connections created based upon knowing others in life, that’s not how success is achieved in life, its by you upholding yourself to positive characteristics or traits, deemed acceptable to others, staying normal, not by standing out, or deviating from the norm, and not by calling attentions to yourself, for sympathies in life.
You can never have too many friends, and the friends we keep throughout the years, are irreplaceable. According to thehopeline.com, here are several ways to be a good friend: (1) be real, (2) be honest, (3) be a good listener, (4) make time for your friend, (5) keep their secrets, (6) encourage your friend, (7) be loyal, (8) be willing to work through conflict, and (9) Watch out for your friend.  Never give up on your friends, we all go through troubles in life and face challenges, its okay to go out of your way to help them, “never half-ass things when it comes to your friends.”  Its often times when we need help the most, we seldom ask for help, especially from friends, not wanting to bother them with our troubles in life. That’s normal. Don’t forget to “follow-up” with your friends, and check in with them, that’s half the battle when it comes to maintaining friends, how easily we get wrapped up in our own lives, or problems, and forget to keep in touch with friends, the sooner you let go, the more difficult it becomes getting back in touch with them, some you are forever bonded to, but not all.  “How can you avoid a falling out with someone you’ve long trusted and cared about? Start by accepting the fact that you can only change yourself. And, almost always, fixing a friendship is a matter of fixing yourself.”  Know that if you get help from a friend, there will be expectation of improvement, especially after making an amends to them, don’t let your friends down. According to psychologytoday.com, “It's no fun when you put effort into helping someone and that individual doesn't follow through. People want to help those who they're sure will act on the help or advice offered.”  Not only will you benefit from having taken the advice of someone you have received help from but you will also in turn help “boost the mood of the helper.”  That’s ones way of being a good friend, even if youre in a tough spot in life, its helps them to help you sometimes, so don’t be afraid to talk to them, or shy away from friendships in life, just because you have problems, sometimes we make friends, while going through troubles in life, “Sometimes you need another person’s wisdom, guidance.” 
 Id at 5.
The longer you stay unhappy the more harm you suffer, as it turns out, you get less done when in a bad mood than when you are in a good mood. So stay happy! Figure out what keeps you feeling centered and stay there, if its ruminating about the past, that’s getting you down, then focus on what days lie before you, not overfocus on what has passed. To better your life, or any condition, you have to stay positive. They don’t just say that, so that you will be more pleasant to be around, the results show, that when you are in tune with your surroundings, and when you are feeling well, you accomplish more in life, if life is about being task-oriented, and goal driven, then you’ll need to maintain some kind of stability, to the way you think about life, to help manage how you feel about your life. According to Spencer Sekulin, “The seeds of happiness and misery begin in your mind. How you think affects how you act. How you act affects how you feel. How you feel affects everything else.”  Don’t become “addict[ed] to unhappiness” … according to psychologytoday.com, “Lifelong struggles with trauma or other negative experiences may fuel an unconscious desire to continually return to the status quo of unhappiness.”  You are not powerless to your thoughts, you are able to control the way you think, and if you can control the way you think, you will in turn be able to control the way you feel about people, places, things, and especially the past. In todays day and age its easy to become triggered, lacking control over what we are exposed to in the news, or on tv, at some point you become an adult, and learn how to filter out any unwanted information, you may come across in life, whether its personal information about others, you do not know, or by exposure, looking into things, and finding out information about self or others, you wish was not said about you, or said period, not all writings or photos will be favorable to your best interests, its mostly people just representing themselves online, that you will have to learn to accept, everyones faux pas, and shortcomings, when it comes to public speaking, disclosures, and image quality, which does not always necessarily accurately reflect the self-esteem of the person, or their mental health status, how you express yourself to the world, if often different than how you feel while alone, and how you vent in private, is probably not how you speak in public, when addressing a crowd of people, this you learn the hard way, how to be professional and not over-disclose information about yourself in private or in public, as this interferes with your ability to communicate fluidly with others, or find yourself among, it often times leaves you feeling distant from others, post disclosures, that’s just you addressing your needs for affirmation in life, which wont always be granted back toward you. Sometimes while unhappy you’ll then find yourself trying harder because youre unhappy, “Dissatisfaction becomes a motivator to work harder, change jobs, eat healthier, spend more time with friends and family, or prevent unwanted behaviors or situations.”  Always take the positive spin on events that change your life for the worst, the better able you are to compartmentalize your thoughts about incidences past, the better you will feel in the long run, having processed what caused you to think negative, and why you were feeling unhappy, and recognize what it is you are doing now for yourself to maintain happiness, that’s called recognizing your value, and reinforcing your self-esteem, which may or may not have been brought down by others, but by yourself. Note that: “Those who blame everything but themselves are blind to the path of self-improvement.”  –“Fear”  can often times interfere with our ability to be happy, and thus slow down the process of “self-improvement.”  “One of the most common responses to fear is that you can’t do something, and while freezing or shutting down, go into a “negative habit pattern”  that doesn’t always serve what is in your best interests, which is to stay positive and be happy. Visualize where you want to be in life, and by visualizing where you want to be in life, you are “feeding your mind … positive mental pictures of yourself performing at your best”  this may include thinking about your prior achievements, not just your failures, and what you did to overcome setback in the past, and stick to a methodology that works for you, to overcome those fears now and in the future. Don’t be “held back” by your fears in life, “The Law of Reversibility says that “If you feel a certain way, you will act in a manner consistent with that feeling.”  Therefore disciplining yourself, until that fear goes away, learn first how to switch gears, transforming a bad day into a good day, and soon enough your life will change too, and overall picture and outlook in life, will hopefully then become more positive, as your actions, thoughts, beliefs and feelings reflect that new found control, “Your ability to confront, deal with, and act in spite of your fears is the key to happiness and success.” 
 Id at 2.
 Id at 1.
 Id at 1.
 Id at 5.
 Id at 5.
 Id at 5.
 Id at 5.
Whenever you like someone, first off, always be positive, jokes to or about, especially talking about others is a huge turn off, to anyone considering you, for a like back. Be confident not problematic, the more problems you share, the heavier you feel, the more difficult to love you become, and the more space they give you. Don’t be combative, there is a time and a place for complaining, never to anyone you love complain, you may receive complaints, but don’t complain about its likely to offend those in your company, who expect you to be happy when theyre around. Life is short, but whats even shorter is the time spent with others, in order to be successful in any relationship, you have to have a life of youre own, don’t become too obsessed with the lives of others, the more comfortable you are living your own life, the more likely others will be to include you in their lives. You can’t just third wheel relationships in life, these types of relationships usually occur when youre alone, and in between dating, tend to be more attracted toward those who have it all in life, to be surrounded by those with lives, and have them be equally attracted to you, you have to be confident with yourself, not ashamed of your progress in life (ie social status); be mindful of the privileges you do have in life. Be goal-oriented, have goals in life, beyond just hooking up or dating, its when youre not thinking about others, others think about you, its when youre not looking, others are looking at you, and its when you don’t have much in life going for you, that you need to try harder, and its when you work hard, you are gifted more privileges in life, that’s just how life goes, unfortunately for most, we spend more time alone trying to achieve to have those short moments of success, and so be it, chosen or not chosen, you have to love yourself, if you ever want to become someones mate later in life, no matter who youre attracted to in between. Think for yourself, not for others, usually those most admired in life, are those with thoughts and opinions of their own, able to carry on a conversation, not reliant upon the other for a lift, the better able you are at lifting others, the more likely they will come to during times of need or stability, if you cannot provide stability, its unlikely that you will be deemed a catch, and left alone until you achieve the stability required to be in relationships in life, have friends, keep your friends, and don’t drop your friends, when its time to have a relationship, make sacrifices in life, but don’t sacrifice your social life, to accommodate the insecurities of another, all relationships require trust, be trustworthy, and reliable, if you want to be loved back. Not everyone will be a match in life, and the relationships that do work out in the long run, are between those who are patient with one another not in need of eachother, but able to function independently on their own, without the other, that’s called bonded, when you don’t need constant reassurances, feel close to someone, even when youre not with them, or with them around, always maintain loyalties to those you love.
The key to being productive is setting goals for yourself. In fact, most leaders are task-oriented. Know your priorities in life, that means be able “to sort tasks, decide their importance and create a plan to complete those tasks is essential. When you prioritize tasks, try sorting them by order of urgency, effort required and deadline.”  Know your responsibilities in life, and be able to “communicate your plans and goals to team members, whether through email, one-on-one conversations or group meetings.”  And lastly, have some sort of strategy for accomplishing your goals in life, and if you are a leader “you must be able to implement processes that your team can understand and follow.”  Create a schedule for yourself, and if you are a leader, be able to help others follow a schedule too by “implement[ing] shared, interactive calendars and to-do lists and have employees submit regular process updates.”  As a blogger, you will experience plenty of moments where you feel compelled to campaign for yourself or others, feeling the sense of empowerment of having a following, and wanting to speak to everyone in a way to help change them, or share your viewpoints about the issues that you care about. Be careful not to become too opinionated, and lose your audience, over-caring about the times, and becoming so affected and emotional, that you yourself become unstable as the writer, always maintain some kind of balance, where your audience is not affected equally, by whats been bothering you, and if youre happy with the times, then say so, and if there is more that you can do to help others, then do so, that’s part of the creative process of establishing an identity for yourself as a blogger, its not quite the helping professions, but likewise you are there for others, and able to help them in ways that others have not yet been able to help them or get through to them, you are doing a service to your community, whether you know it or not, keep up the good work! As you develop as a blogger online its important to keep track of your progress, whether taking down notes daily, of your ideas, or simply logging in activities or tasks that you get done along the way, personally and professionally, that’s being organized about your time. Activecampaign.com suggests the following, “As thoughts arise during your work, jot them down. Once you reach a break in your work, you can come back and either tackle them or add them to your larger to-do list.”  To be well liked, and to earn a 5 out of 5 on a Facebook Page, you have to care about your audience, that goes without saying, and in order to care for anyone, you have to care well for yourself. Know that your health comes first, no matter how much you try to help others, you are always limited to sharing what you yourself have experienced first hand or learned about through school or continuing your education, not just by reading online, and summarizing the work of others, that wouldn’t be a blog, by citations only. Figure out what makes you unique to your audience, and keep doing what is working for you, as a writer, and make sure to continue to receive permissions along the way, that’s how to build partnerships, and to get into programs, by asking questions. I might not be in that phase yet, does shareasale.com count? Banners. I guess so. Never give up, as a blogger, much of what you learn is self-taught, that’s why its such a competitive profession, no one can really guide you through the process of establishing a blog, you may get pointers along the way, but its you that comes up with the content, make sure to do your best.
, ,  Id at 1.
Start by liking yourself, especially if youre not happy with the way you look now. Its just looks, remind yourself, that you can change, take better care of yourself, and achieve a look that pleases you. Don’t change to be better accepted by others, change because you want to! According to girlshealth.org,
“Body image is affected by a lot of things, including messages you get from your friends, family, and the world around you. ... Sometimes, having body image issues or low self-esteem may lead to depression, eating disorders, or obesity.” 
As someone who has gone up and down with their weight in recent years … being thinner does not necessarily make you a happier person. Im much happier now overweight than I was when thinner, you have to have the right mindset whenever you choose to diet and exercise excessively to lose the weight, don’t beat yourself up over how you look, or you’ll never be happy no matter what size you are. As someone on meds, battling depression, and trying to lose weight and keep off the weight has been a grueling task, involving walking everyday. Its easy to give up in life, when it comes to dieting, and the sooner you lose the weight unhealthily cutting calories, if not meals from your diet, the quicker you gain all the weight back, the minute you start eating 3 meals a day again. According to shape.com:
“Any form of depression, no matter how mild, affects neurotransmitters that control mood, thinking, appetite, and behavior, making you more likely to eat poorly, skip exercise, and gain weight.” 
Set a schedule for yourself, and keep track of your exercise -I keep a log. Not only does that keep you motivated month to month, but you can easily track your progress, and figure out whats working for you and not working for you. Everyones body is different, some on meds respond better to exercise than others, I know that being on meds, means that I will have accept being a bigger size in life, and that its important to take my meds, whether I am able to lose the weight or not. I highly doubt that I will be able to lose 50lbs in a year, but its worth trying to, sometimes you have to set more realistic goals for yourself, in order to begin the process of achieving your ideal body type, set smaller goals, to achieve larger ones.
No matter whos in your life now, or whos with us now, appreciate and value how far you’ve come, and if life is feeling long, well then youre right on track. The days should feel short, if youre keeping busy, and falling asleep with ease, well that’s a job well done, and means you have something to look forward to tomorrow, whether it’s a personal project or work that keeps you moving forward in life, don’t stop at whatever is working for you. Its okay from time to time to go backwards and be afraid of moving forwards in life, the tendency is to think that more is required of you to disclose, than is necessary to any relationship, work or otherwise. Do you know who you are, yes? Okay do they know who you are, yes? Okay then that’s all youre required to disclose, leave the past in the past, and your medical history, keep private. Sometimes work and relationships don’t happen for you in life, if your plate is too full, or if youre not feeling well, and disclose too much about how youre feeling, and if youre not feeling well, then its okay to take a medical leave of absence. No one really wants to hear that youre struggling in life, why people usually leave you alone, if so, just do your best to reintegrate yourself into society, and be a functioning member again, this takes time. If youre not feeling well, adaa.org states that:
“Depression can impact every area of your life, including but not limited to how you sleep and eat, your education and career, your relationships, health, and concentration. Individuals suffering from depression often also have comorbid disorders, such as alcohol and drug abuse or other addictions. Depression doesn’t just occur for an individual in vacuum; it can affect your friends, family, co-workers, and everyone around you.” 
You have to keep going in life, allow people to have lives of their own, and you should have a life of your own. No one can live life for you, that’s for you to decide, how to live your life, and whatever you decide to do, be sure not to self-harm in the process of recovering from whatever is ailing you, set yourself further behind in life. We all go through hardships, and face difficulties, fitting in, and feeling successful, and being apart of, especially when we are not feeling at our best, tend to shy away from engaging in activities, that used to bring us joy. Why is it that when we are doing well, everything happens, and when things aren’t going right everything stops. Ive always wondered that. As your life begins to improve, take small steps when backtracking, and make sure to do so with a therapist, not your boyfriends or significant others, or friends, chances are they have their own viewpoints and vision of how they see the world, that when collided with your troubles, makes them think about what has bothered them in the past, that’s a group therapy thing, not for everyday conversation, just do your best!
No life is perfect, you can sit and ruminate and get nothing done, or you can be positive, pick up a book, read, write, or do something to pass the time, that does not involve self-harming, such as being social, and not drinking or doing drugs recreationally, to feel good. Today I sat at the DMV for 2 hours, and went on a 2 hour and 30 minute run, time well spent. Some days you will have energy, and other days, during bouts of depression, will feel unmotivated to try hard in life. Whatever you do, don’t stop, and keep going in life. I never really understood what that meant until I go put on night meds, sometime, after law school, with an unfinished JD, beginning my LLM, got into another masters program, a better school, an ABA approved law school. I think for the most part, your story is your story, unless you make your story public, then it becomes apart of other peoples stories in life, having known you, and heard from you, knowing about you, and your struggles in life, be a positive influence always, and inspiration to others, or otherwise take a backseat as follower to others, whos wellness, may or may not be based on being more well than you, for some that keeps them going in life, to know that they are more well off than others, or above others to say the least. Don’t let that get the best of you, everyone has confidence issues, and for some being confident is about their wellness, and ability to achieve in life, which may or may not have anything to do with you, whether you are competition or inspiration to the intellgiences of others, do your best to contribute in a positive way to the shared thoughts of others or “group conscious” and do not interfere with the wellness of others, sharing about your past, or past inabilities to stay well, as this may contribute to triggering the pasts of others, or emotions as empathizing with your positions in life, or worst moments, people generally shy away from interaction with those who have struggled in life, how many homeless people do you know? And/or are close to? Exactly … eventually you fall so far off the beaten path of normalcy, that eventually people detach once you become not well, that doesn’t mean that you are like those who have left society, for a worse off existence or livelihood, know your best, you may no longer benefit from your surroundings in the same way others are able to, but that doesn’t mean that youre less worthy of living an important existence in life, blogging is surely not the way to be remembered in life, but rather by your work skills, accolades, academic achievements, etc. that you are able to get jobs, and keep going in life, if not, suffering results from lack of ability which is a result of your inability to stay focused now and achieve, see how that all ties together in the long run. Think about what youre doing now, and whether that is going to help or hurt your abilities later on in life, not all are privileged in ways, that they are able, many suffer the consequences of their disabilities in life, and finding work their suited for … writing is not an easy profession, experimental at best until you are are able to earn a living doing what you love to do, write. If necessary do take jobs that expand your skillset, do try changes to your career path and take courses outside of the scope of your current educational goals, everything helps, and the more well rounded you are in life, the better able you will be to adjust to the times, get jobs, stay social, and live a healthy and happy existence, that is not congruent to whats going wrong in the world, and have every happiness affected easily, when things do not go right in life.
When your hay days are over, never forget where you come from, its likely you were surrounded by people you would not usually hang out with, out, who help you get nowhere in life, it’s the relationships we keep that matter most. Make quality friends along the way, that aren’t based on doing drugs or drinking with, let alone have romantic relationships in life, that are built upon those same foundations in life. Stay sober. There is so much more to life, Im not saying that everyone who does yoga and hikes are the only ones at peace with themselves, but … they have something going for them in life, they do things not everyone does. How to be one of those people? Can you stay centered when the times are tough, or do you have outbursts, frustrated with the world and with others. Tips for staying centered by mentalhealthamerica.net are :
As you grow and mature and come to find yourself, you’ll grow out of certain things in life, including humor. Especially when youre taking life seriously. In fact, Nando Raynolds M.A., argues that: “Humanity in general is maturing and behaviors that were socially acceptable in the past have become widely unacceptable.”  Why is this? Its not just movies, that stopped using comedy, its seems that the more scary life becomes, the greater the need for social acceptability in behaviors and commentary, that is that less of us are open to negativity from others, even in a humorous way, everything taken seriously, and nothing taken lightly. Don’t be so threatened by those you don’t understand in life, your safety is paramount, and in order to make others feel safer around you, its important that you stay stable, whether that’s by maintaining sobriety, or just working and being an outstanding human, keep busy, and contribute in positive ways, not by relishing on the days when you were in your 20s and invisible, those days may be long gone, however don’t lose positive momentum, when looking back, you are still you! Enjoy life. -What is staying centered? According to counselingrecovery.com: “Staying centered” is an internal experience of feeling calm and confident within yourself. It’s a feeling of deep trust in one’s abilities or intuition.”  Remind yourself of your self-worth, know your affirmations, and when you start to believe in yourself again, don’t go back through those phases in life, keep moving forward. We all make mistakes in life, and at times exercise poor judgment, which affects our behavior, how we sound, and how we look -be positive inside out. When you express yourself, from a good place in life, others listen, that’s not because you are someone they wish they were, but because you have overcome your struggles, usually first to identify your progress, are your loved ones, you will know when you are better, when everyone seems at ease around you, that’s you being at ease with yourself. Note that progress in life, and pat yourself on the back, you’ve come a long way!
The tendency when things are not going right is to be critical of others, and even worse critical of ourselves. For those of us who are hyper analytical, we’ll think and think of all the ways we could have done a better job, and at the same time, while trying to better ourselves, put ourselves down in the process, of trying to fix whats gone wrong, make our amends, and move forward in life. Life is not perfect, and as the saying goes “no one is perfect.” Whenever we try to achieve a norm, the only person we are selling short in life, is ourselves, theres always something more attractive about being unique, than it is to fit in with the rest, there will always be standards, but don’t match your standards to what pleases others, youre bound to feel ill and lose your competitive edge in life, comparing yourself to others, that’s not how to better oneself, always be the best version of yourself, you cannot replicate the times, you cannot replicate people, “you can’t replace people,” even worse yet, you cannot replace time lost in the past, not being happy with yourself, think then of all the opportunities, you had missed out on, putting yourself down, staying home, not being proactive, and keeping your problems to yourself, if you want more in life, be a stickler about what needs work, but don’t beat yourself up over it, recovery is a process, and “change doesn’t happen overnight.” -Why is it important to be positive during difficult times? There is a time and a place for correcting the behaviors of others, and there is a time and a place for greater acceptance of others, during difficult times, sometimes it helps to say it how it is, we see strength in people like that, and sometimes its best to listen and go with the flow, have a sense of direction in life, and don’t become so spoiled and content when things are good, that you stop improving upon your best, there is always time to do work, educate oneself, and further ones intelligences in life, this can only lead to greater combinations of success later in life, the more knowledgeable you become, the better able you are to cope with whatever life throws at you, including the times.