When Time is Running Out ...
You cant go backwards in life, from something you have done wrong, that is something you can only move forwards from, and accept those in your company as they are, without worry. I think telling your story is helpful when you are doing well, and can speak about your experiences in life in a positive way, which doesn’t always happen in the immediate, it takes a few tries at putting yourself out there in life and getting hurt, before you finally blossom. What youre left with is the same feeling you are able to provide, expect no more or less than what you are able to provide on a individual basis, establish rapport. I once described experience as occurring on a job by job basis, not by trying to get a lot of attention all at once to be known or recognized in life. If you are afforded the opportunity to work, and if you are allowed to write then do so, within reason. I have always tried to set limits for myself, and I understand the saying that no one is perfect, does not apply, in instances in which you are found to be in the wrong. See that as a learning lesson. Accept disappointment past, and reservations now, and respect the viewpoints of those who knew you, heard about your experiences, and maybe don’t agree with you writing online, that’s based upon your condition as bipolar, and in the event you have gotten voices or become sick, consider carefully whether you can handle the pressure of being thought of in the negative, it happens, and it will not bother you, so long as you don’t allow for it. No one has a perfect hand in life, everyone has to prove themselves one way or the other, just don’t quit while youre ahead, stop when you are well, second guess yourself if youre at peace, read too much into the feelings or commentaries of others, respect when someone is not happy with you, and do your best not to contribute to that viewpoint of you, no matter how disappointed others may be, considering what you look like, sound like, or are or have been capable of. Get your work done but don’t forget to be social, yes working hard is serious stuff, but you also don’t have to make a lifestyle out of taking yourself too seriously in life, the more conservative you become, trying to get along with everyone, the harder criticism hits by the time you’ve made it anywhere in life. No one can remind you of your worth, or push you if youre not feeling well, that is something you have to decide for you own, to continue waiting for love, or to give up on the whole idealized version of socialization and flirting. That was becoming what I feared, made to look like someone who is comfortable in that way, and that did not demonstrate my strength of character, or shyness, or reservations, it seems I always seem to get hurt in that way, the more loving I am, the longer I wait, the more loving I am, the better the relationship, or so it seemed.
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