Underlying Trends ...
Don’t become an underlying trend to inner turmoils faced by those who are suffering from mental health issues, its not ones responsibility to bear the brute of whatever is bothering people. If I bother you because: (1) I was raped (2) I was left at a bar (3) I have no friends (4) You think Im to blame for my problems (5) You think friends, family, or Schools are to blame for my problems (6) You don’t think I have problems relevant or helpful to what others are going through or able to help others, via my experiences in life (7) Whether you don’t think by my experiences in life I was harmed but benefited from those experiences in life (8) You don’t value my work or my hard work writing, and do not see the value in my writing, that you think its okay to distribute my writing for free (9) You don’t think that if my work that was written in private is shown or distributed would not hurt me, you are being insensitive to my well being as a writer (10) Patience is not valued but is instead viewed as someone who is stalling, without understanding that it cost money to distribute and that one must be ready mentally to share their finished work with everyone, to view, and criticize (11) and because I was sued all the harm that has been done to my reputation was magically reversed to free others from blame, and to leave me alone, as accepting the consequences of drinking, drug use, or suicide attempt. Its no ones fault when someone commits suicide, but the fault of the person who suffers for not getting the help they need and calling 911, or complaining about their circumstances in life. No one who lives a life free from harassment, ridicule, or bullying is ever affected if anyone, myself included, is harmed in that way by others, for having shared my experiences online, its not in jest that you share your experiences online, if its shared its because somehow that experience in life affected you socially, and made you anti-social, and because you are anti-social judged as having some kind of mental health deficit related to you thinking you are bigger than you are, or you thinking that others know you, can read you, or that youre being read by others, interpreted as though you think you are bigger than you are, that is what having bipolar is like, people bossing you around, like youre egotistical or think that youre smarter than you are and need to be put in your place, we all suffer from abuses in life, the more centered you can be in the face of bullying, and other people putting you in your place in life, the better off you’ll be, and if others think it appropriate to treat you as though you are the pervert to their problems or a source of unwanted solicitation, conversation, or interaction, than that’s a manifestation of their need to describe the discomfort they feel being around you, as though you are in need of something more from them to feel whole, stable, or loved, the more needy you are, the more likely you will be to get hurt, by people who think they are smarter than you, and the more introverted you become, and the more anti-social you become, the more susceptible you are to getting hurt, when your defenses are down, and you have no one to help you but yourself. Lifes not about sexuality, or being girly, or proving whether or not your gay, feel inferior to others, or look up to other women, and that because you have experienced inferiority means that you are jealous of the traits that others bear, or wish you were someone else or wish you were something bigger than you are in life, if you cannot be yourself in public, then there is something wrong with you, whether that’s a product of how you have been treated in private by others, or in public, it will all manifest itself, as a writer online, its hard to hide anything that may be bothering you, and if its your self-worth that’s at issue, then that will all come into play, as others assess your worth online, and determine whether you deserve to get paid or not for your written work, whether it has benefited everyone or whether it has hurt anyones sense of self or being. How can anyone who gets put down by society, sued, and treated at someone with mental health issues, who is an embarrassment to others, be treated as someone above others, dictating how one should think, and be held responsible for the mental health of those who have committed suicide. Its because of disbelief in others that groups suffer, and its from disbelief in the betterment of society in spite of the times, that people as individuals suffer. Have faith, that no matter what is trending or who is trending, the joke will always be on them, and to do our best as a society, not to enable others to behave and act in those ways, as though its okay to make fun of others, and do our best to present the best versions of ourselves, no matter how easily affected we are to these losses in life. And whether or not you agree with my hashtagging as helpful or not I would have rather hashtagged and posted flyers than done nothing at all, and help create a broader awareness of the issues surrounding mental health, than just shed light on my own personal issues, as being of importance. Whether you think Im being helpful or not, is your opinion, and if for any reason you do not agree with anything I have said, than its okay to call 911, no one is stopping you, just don’t make me suicidal because you think if I die that will better explain what has just been discussed. Just because one pervert accused of rape committed suicide, does not mean that if I commit suicide it is because I bear guilt, and that it’s a deserved, is the rumor theyre trying to spread about me, Im a woman, do not treat me as though Im the offender to anyones best interests. #stopsuicide -Its because I was a crisis hotline counselor, and because I have left relationships, that others think that there is something justifiably defective about me, that Im responsible for correcting my own problems in life (Ive never blamed anyone for my problems, only explained how I was affected reputation wise), not taking into account how I was or was not treated by others, and let go. Those who get let go, are deemed troublesome or responsible for their own mental health issues, designated as addicts or alcoholics, to protect the best interests of an organization who either does or does not support them, including the schools to which they belong, how important is the reputation of any organization, than any one persons well being could negatively reflect on that organizations ability to help foster positive growth in others. Something to think about. -If youre not suicidal then stop bringing up the issues you think are causing suicide, to see if I become suicide and express those grievances, that it is okay to mark me off as someone who is suicidal and doesn’t deserve to write or be listened to. If I get suicidal no one empathizes with me, and throws me into the hospital, claiming that their health is at risk of harm, why is it okay for others to talk about whether or not they have been suicidal, and not one says anything to them, or questions them, but supports them, that’s not how to prevent suicide, by making it okay for some to share their depressed feelings out loud, but making it inappropriate for others to share whether or not they are depressed out loud, where is the good thinking in that, if any sharing is to be out loud, it must be in the solution, either something you’ve overcome in life, and what youre doing to better yourself now, or share something you have struggled with, and where you are not compared to where you have been, and anything that puts your life in jeopardy, means to be shared only with LAPD, not enable others to retaliate on you, based on the stories you tell, no one should be harmed, so long as the LAPD knows my timeline, and whether or not I am suicidal or doing well, is all that matters. If we cant all get along as to these issues, then its best you read something else. To make me defend myself, or to fight about things or terms not heard or said to my face or loud enough in public for me to respond to, would just make me look bipolar or delusional, why its not worth my time, to respond to anything that’s not concrete, or just thought others think.
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