(1) Kick the Habit of Being Negative
Negativity is the fastest route to disaster, visualize where you want to be in life, without expecting the worst to occur, the less you fear, the more doors open for you in life. Face the fact that fact that youre not perfect, we all have demons, don’t overexpose yourself, you’re likely to kick yourself in the butt later on for it. No image is perfect, beauty comes from within, the better you feel, doing for yourself things that make you feel good, the less guilty you’ll feel talking to others: diet, exercise, be proud of yourself and who youre becoming.
(2) Less is More
We tend to think that more or something will make us feel better, that’s addiction, not knowing when to stop. Know your limits in life, its not necessary to put icing on the cake, over clarify self to others, be defensive, or share too much about our lives and our problems, when meeting someone new, or talking to someone past. To catch up in life with others, do your best to know and recognize what youre doing well, and be sure to share positive things about yourself to others. How do you want people to know you? What do you want people to know about you? What is necessary to keep private? How to get well, when others know youre not feeling well? Interviews are not the only conversations in life you need to prepare yourself in advance for, its not all about you, be kind and courteous to your audience always, be memorable, inspiring, don’t enable others to fixate on negatives. Always maintain a positive outlook in life, to speak well be confident with your words.
(3) Don’t Complain
If things aren’t going right for you in life, recognize what needs work, without pointing out to others whats going wrong in your life, that’s how to overcome privately whats bothering you, without the added stress of worrying what people think as youre going through something in life. We’ve all been there, lost, in between phases in life, breakups, have faith, the more positive you are about self and others, the better everyone will look and feel. Everything adds up, sometimes being too opinionated, makes you look bad if others think that you think youre smart or know better, never assume that others a flawed whenever a misunderstanding arises, as to interpretation and inference, see the good in others.
(4) Stay Active
You can’t expect things to happen for you in life, if youre not in motion, moving forward, or doing things in life, that mirror the person you present yourself as online. The best way to support what is said, by you or by others, is to be a person of your word, not always responding to what negatives are said about you, theres no requirement to prove others wrong in life, if you are doing what you feel is right, its not necessary to waste time and energy proving others wrong, or convincing them you are well, sometimes when trying to garner acceptances from others, we disempower ourselves, empowering the opinions that others hold of us, to control our thoughts and actions, be your own person, take your own lead in life, don’t be led or misled by your worries, or the worries that others hold of you.
(5) Know Yourself
How you self-identify sets you free, if being unique is important to you, then be unique. It shouldn’t matter if others think you are an imitation of another, playing off the identities of others, or trying to be like someone youre not, that’s based upon looking at you, and looking at whos around you, and comparing your looks to others. People will always assume that someone who is insecure in life, feels less than, or that someone lacking confidence wishes they were someone else. As you move forward career wise, don’t allow the negative judgments of others to interfere with your progress, your motivations in life will always be questioned, people putting you down as thinking you you think youre bigger than you are. Stay grounded, sometimes those who look happiest as judged as being full of themselves.
(6) Be Patient
You cannot expect change in others if you yourself are incapable of changing. If you want to be treated differently in life, and not put down by others, then figure out why youre not liked by others, it never hurts to accommodate the interests of your biggest critics in life. Don’t try to fix what is not broken, sometimes while anticipating the worst, we wait for things to get worse before they get better to make changes in our lives. It takes a lot of courage to take the initiative in life, to be different, comfortable with yourself, even if you don’t fit the mold of what is beautiful or acceptable, if you can adjust to the changes that others go through in life, have faith that they will similarly adjust to your condition in life.
(7) Stay Positive
Typical advice youre given whenever you say something negative about yourself. Why is it that we are always reprimanded when we think we’re doing well in life, totally focused on ourselves, going in life, made to pause, and give our undivided attentions to others, when we’re doing well in life. Just because you think youre on to something, or going places in life, does not mean that everything will work out for you in the long run, its wonderful that you believe in yourself, its harder to get others to believe in you too, trust the direction your taking in life, toward achieving your goals in life, that they wont nurture, any extended efforts to make change happen in your life, assume there is something wrong or defective about you, if you go the extra the mile toward achieving in life, if youre used to trying really hard to improve upon your best, then ignore criticisms, continue to believe in yourself.
(8) Keep in Touch
Alone time is sometimes necessary to recharge, but not until the point, you go into shock when youre in a crowded room, among others, feel out of place. Recognize you are human, without trying to doctor your feelings too much out loud. Friends will listen, be there to support you through your best and worst moments in life, its hard to take advices from others, when we think we know best, the more you fixate on where youre going in life, the less right now you feel moving forward, don’t isolate, that’s the worst thing you can do for yourself, if youre trying to stay focused, how quickly you’ll let yourself go, when disconnected from others, work hard, but not to the point the wellness of others intimidates you, stay connected, whether you have a job or not, never feel less than in life, because you don’t have it all, life goes on, with or without people in your life, never put all your eggs in one basket, and expect things to work out for the better, that will likely stifle progress in that area of your life, attentions brought away from whats important to you. Its easy to be avoidant under stress, don’t allow yourself to become co-dependent to the needs of others, that’s a surefire way of becoming frozen to your own best interests.
(9) Express Yourself
Its okay to share your feelings, its not important that you shine, even when at your best, sometimes when we least expect it, others pay attention to us, and when trying too hard, no one notices us. Don’t expect others to be nice to you when youre confident and doing well in life, they will always assume the worst, so long as you share online, expect others to treat you like an addict, only share your best, and if your best is not regarded as smart or professional, then don’t allow the acceptances of others, to make you feel bad about yourself. Only share what you are comfortable with writing wise and photo wise. It’s your overall work-product determines what is felt when others see you, theres no statistical advantage to sharing more, or only sharing your best, its all about how you feel when looking at yourself, if others don’t see the same person you see that’s not your problem.
(10) Remind Yourself Youre Worth It
Its not by how many likes you receive in life to know whether you’ve got what it takes to become a working professional, in order to get jobs in life, you need to have had jobs in life. Dating doesn’t work the same way, the more boyfriends you’ve had, the more you will be judged by those losses, devalued, or rejected when not new to love, being new to love means having the capacity to not be picky with expectations, be in the moment present, and able to be unconditional toward others without the other feeling less than or as compared to, more or less put together in life. Any loss of enthusiasm means youre not ready to date, if you are not happy with yourself, it will be hard to make someone else happy or feel good, confident, its not about image, its about feeling fulfilled in life, proud.
To let out your creative spirit, don’t compare yourself to others, learn how to think and visualize where you want to be in life, without setting limits for your potential, by feeling worse off, or not as capable of achieving the same. Everything takes time, forgiveness, building a following, and coming up with ideas as you go, of how to maintain that audience. You get better overtime. Always continue to further your education, read books, follow blogs, practice you communication skills, do things that build your confidence in life, not engage in activities that make you appear to have low self-esteem. You can’t build a website, without having a purpose in life, don’t expect others to keep tabs on you while you are lost and disorganized, that’s something you learn later in life with experience, that the better you are, the more responsibilities you are given in life, sometimes you are asked to do things in life for others, and sometimes no one bothers to mention what needs work, or share their criticisms in life. Its usually the case that when you don’t hear from someone that theyre doing okay, its customary to share accomplishments and good news with your Dad, and handle everything else with your Mom, online, once you become a blogger, its when they don’t hear from you they stop following, I’m not sure whether they worry, or just find other things to do or read. Its not as competitive as it looks blogging, attentions are always shared, like a mixed newsfeed, that’s about 10% of your attention span (energy it takes to read), that would be the goal in times of trauma, not be a difficult read. Don’t feel overwhelmed, but its important to care as a writer for your audience, not in a mothering or nurturing way, just be detail oriented, and as organized as you can be with your thoughts or whatever it is youre sharing in life.
Its been a pretty quiet day for the most part, a little bit of humor helps, but don’t break the silence, whe everyone is at peace, minding their own business, draw attentions to yourself. Its moments like these the voices stop, your good character will always be brought into question no matter what phase of life you are in if you are considered a working professional, that’s why we have private lives away from work or academic endeavors to share our feelings, not inside the workplace. Its never cute to be negative, that’s generally a turn off and lifts no ones spirits in life, including your own. If your purpose in life is to help others or to help make others feel better about themselves, then don’t put yourself down in the process of expressing your points of view in life, theres a way to share criticisms of others that helps everyone, that’s if to correct and help make better a person, but the world is not a friendly place always, everyone has their own issues in life. Talking about others, is the quickest route to failure socially, as everyone is connected by a 3rd connection, at least on Linkedin. Never complain, the more you complain in life, the fewer opportunities avail themselves to you in life, that’s a surefire way to be a let down to others, who are looking to work among those who don’t complain and get the work done, without personal issues interfering with their work productivity. If you lose steam in life, youre not the only one who gets tired, everyone has trouble keeping going in life, we are not machines, its okay to be human, take breaks, and work at your own pace in life, there is not fast route to success career wise, not even if you know people, you will always have to prove to yourself to get jobs and maintain jobs, no matter what your upbringing in life is, no matter what perspective you have of the world, and the professionals among them. If you have a job title that isn’t one we already have memorized, then congratulations for staying focused, and continuing to move forward in life. For those of us who have lost momentum, have faith that you will recover, if it’s a bad day keep going, rest when tired, and know your limits in life with others, you can only share so much about your own life and problems, that you begin to bore your audience members, who gradually begin to feel more put together than you having shared your causes for mental illness in the past, or reoccurring mental health issues now. If you are having trouble staying well, its okay to keep those facts between you and your Doctor, no ones life deserves to turn into a guessing game of issues affecting them and their abilities. You cannot compare anyones condition now to their past successes in life, everyone changes, especially after hospitalizations and treatments, you should never be that into anyones life, that you begin digging through their past for dirt about them. Learn to accept people as they are now, whether you trust them or not, whether you think highly of them or not, whether you think youre smarter than them in life, and whether or not you respect them. You would assume that people judge you based on how you are with them, but much more gets taken into account when judging you or determining whether you are a nice person or a good person, genuine, including everything you say privately to self and others, and whether or not you are consistent in your interactions with others, treat all the same. The more nervous or on edge you are in life, about how you appear, the less present you will be able to connect well with others, and be interpreted as sharp or focused, feeling foggy is not contagious based upon looking at someone or knowing someone prior to meeting them, and then thinking about life too deep, that’s not the fog or freeze I’m referring to, that happens, never blame others for your lack of focus in life, be less competitive, and have goals in life besides love, be steady.
You’ve come a long way, why would you want to go backwards and get mad at yourself or others. If everyone has moved forward, learn to go with the flow in life. Allow people to hold their opinions of you that’s just them protecting themselves from harm i.e. let downs in life, that doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you or defective. That simply means wait, either for people to come around and let you back into their lives, or move forward and meet new people in life. That’s not a new life, you have created for yourself, when you fail to let go of the past, that’s you allowing your past to dictate new relationships. Do not judge someone who is single and working on themselves, that doesn’t mean that they are a reject, that could actually mean that they value themselves and waiting for the right companion in life. Until then its okay to be friends with people, that’s not a relationship, where one another is expected to take care of the other emotionally, that’s just talking. Talking to others is okay, but not until the point of attachment, that’s when you become reliant on others for a sense of normalcy, and to feel centered, whom without you get lost easily, wrapped up in emotions, stuck in the past, you choose which disabilities in life keep you from being able in life, you either manage with the skills you have, or become unhappy with what you’ve got to work with in life. What makes you feel better about yourself? Lifes not all about acceptances and privileges in life, or companionship, its about happiness, being able to change a bad day to a good day, and withstand hurdles in life emotionally, when you feel fulfilled in life, that’s balance, and pride occurs once you have accomplished a goal, beyond your expectations of yourself, that’s looking back in a good way, upon your progress, not measure your own self-worth based upon what others have said about you, based upon what you have shared privately to yourself or to your attending physicians, that’s your right to privacy, and so long as you are feeling well, then continue to do things in life, that keep you feeling well, without regret, and without holding resentments in life. If its not a problem now, don’t make it a problem, that’s the main lesson, if its something that has bothered you, that isn’t currently of issue, then don’t bring up something for the sake of bringing up something past to talk about now, if the risk of loss is greater than its potential to resolve current problems in your life, then that’s not a problem to mention.
People will always blame their discomforts in life on others, especially those who have suffered from mental health issues. If you are already suffering, its not necessary to worry what others think at that point, your health comes first. Don’t self-harm. Its easy when others are not comfortable around you, to blame you or your behaviors in life as justifiably off or deserving of being taunted or put down in life, that’s just taking a side, to minimize the suffering of the person who was harmed. If you were not present, its none of your business what happened in the lives of others, that has caused them disability in life, if theres anything you should let go of in life, its always what you do not have control over, people, and the past, especially the past lives of others. Everyone seems to claim victim, whenever someone is suffering, to deflect blame from themselves, argue its justified, or that they brought it upon themselves, mental illness, sometimes sometimes is not the case, especially when no drugs are alcohol are involved. Sometimes pain and suffering, occurs when we think too much, no its not about people pleasing, that’s not a subject that rings a bell other than the fact that our bridge was tagged above the 405, if necessary to reference and not refer to, that would be nice, thank you. No matter who your connections are in life, or associations, that doesn’t create comfort, when someone does not like you or trust you or thinks less of you, deserving in life, feels as though your mental health issues harmed their health or well being, then those are moments when forgiveness is not granted, even if you move forward or become a better person, there will always be resentments there, we hope not. Stirring negatives back into the interpretations of the lives of those who have bettered themselves or gotten their health back, is not worth furthering fights over toward or against those individuals in life, to be like what they thinked happened in the past, and say if like or similar then have standing for suit, and based upon job or profession delineate blames upon others, that does no good moving forward, it makes me sick, and it makes those around me sick, not to be around me, but to similarly suffer from negative interpretations of them, based upon their new association to me, which if even a select few are trying to argue mental illness exists, will keep furthering that belief until something happens in that persons life that makes them make themselves look more mentally ill than they are. Mental illness is not the same as disability, be respectful of one anothers hardships in life, not all are purposefully brought upon themselves, left in isolation or suffering in life, that doesn’t make them criminal or mentally ill, just because they do not currently live a lifestyle within a social hierarchy, socialization does not come easy to me, spoiled in the sense that I grew up with the same close friends my whole life, who Im now distant from. Its not about pretending to be something that you are not, it is assumed that one who is punished if they are able to achieve again, are in a better condition now, you will always suffer hardships once you encounter punishments in life, its then you have to begin proving yourself to others, if you are getting tired proving yourself capable to the wrong people in life, you could burn out and get nowhere in life, manage you time and energy wisely, its really no ones fault, when time is mismanaged, procrastination occurs, and careers are put on hold, held behind in life. Its not fun to be an open book and constantly dug at for dirt, even while suffering my own personal hardships in life, that’s not being a perfectionist to better oneself at that point, it then becomes a matter of survival. What was once fun, blogging, has now become a serious sport. I think that was the point of putting me at a disadvantage in life, to see how I fair suffering, or feeling like I’m dying, overcome graver disabilities in life, than a learning disability, to test to see whether I am honest, or have lied about the past, and allow God to decide whether I live, based upon whether I have been a good person, or whether I have been a bad person, to explain for me, or justify why I became suicidal to argue that I was being bad at the time, and because I was being bad at the time is why I attempted suicide. No I was not being bad at the time, I was trying to get help, and because I drank and relapsed, I attempted suicide, none of your business. Now is not the time to be casual with my words or subject myself to suit, and be a let down in life, it seems people only feel better about themselves when they can prove you wrong in life, never fight with someone who is recovering from a suicide attempt, that’s an unnecessary infliction of emotional distress upon a person who recognizes what has gone wrong and is doing their best to correct their behaviors now, live life. Don’t play God.
When you have no experience, everything feels overwhelming, each new task carrying a heavy burden, to understand, comprehend, and function knowing fully what youre doing and why youre doing what youre doing, that’s being professional. Whether or not you understand what youre doing, do you still do the right thing, you will always be tested in life, to see how good of a decision maker you are, before being allowed to make important decisions for yourself or others for that matter, whether that be through work or in relationships that require you to take on the responsibility of caring for another other than yourself. When your priorities are in order, that shows that one you care about yourself, and that two you are able to care for another, until then, you are required mostly to work on yourself to prove otherwise. The skys the limit, when it comes to responsibilities, the better situated you are in life, the more viable a companion you become, its second nature to accept those who are successful in life, without worry of feeling bad for them, as they are able to take care of themselves, its harder to be around people who need to be taken care of or in need of help, theres more room for worry, and more room for error, which upon failures no one wants to be responsible for. Once you fail to meet the standards of others, it doesn’t matter how high of standards you have set for yourself, or how hard you have tried, or how far you have come, once someone is unhappy with you there is no pleasing them, once someone has given up on you, there is no going back for understanding, once someone does not believe in you, there is no room for clarifying self, and once someone has let you go, there is no convincing them otherwise that you are deserving of positions in life, or taking on responsibilities now that you previously were considered for. Some will be harder on you than others, accept that much about life, people expect the best, when it comes to work and in relationships, it’s a competitive world, and image is important, its hard to focus on more than one thing at a time, if you cant balance it all, then don’t incorporate new people into your life, who do not love you as you are, everyone blossoms at their own paces in life, and if you have yet to blossom, choose those who do not impede on your self-growth, and allow you to be yourself, work at your own pace in life, that’s not finding yourself, or being lost, not all those who appear lost are lost, sometimes it’s a matter of wearing more makeup, shopping for more outfits, or sending fewer texts, whatever it is that makes you look like a needy unstable companion in life, don’t be co-dependent on others for reassurances in life, youll surely be let down, if under the guidance and confidence of another. Everyone tries to tell your story, when they think that everyone is watching, and an explanation is needed, before you know it, the relationship has ended, and everything on the outside looks and appears as if to benefit the image of the other, who was able to move forward, and prove fault of the person worse off in life, sometimes people need space to make important decisions in life, having nothing to do with the status of a relationship, if they love you, no time apart will be indicative of setting off a series of emergency circumstances, one should not need to be needed to feel needed, and once that need stops, one should not be reprimanded for focusing on oneself in life, and triggered, led astray in life put down, a clear break is a clear break, allow breaks to happen, without getting upset, that’s not how to win back someone you wanted to be with, or express resentments toward anyone who spent equal time caring for the other, in life. Losses occur both ways, time invested in caring on both sides, its not just on the side of the person left, or not able to return, and if your past is not clear to others, then you will relive those scenarios later in life, until you are proven to be weak or worth letting go, that’s how one suffers by sharing about breakups in life, your side is never taken but always the side of the person to whom your discussions are about, that’s the benefit of living a quiet life, with the exception of having no control over how your story is told behind your back, explained.
Its easy to judge those who you think have easy lives, no one has it easy in life, we all have to wake up each day, and go to bed each night, feeling fulfilled and of value in life. Don’t think too hard, and don’t especially be too hard on yourself. If you can manage that much, with ease, then you’ve got a head start above others. It seems that even the simplest things in life, we take for granted, once we become sick, constantly adjusting to the opinions of others, feel drained, that’s when its okay to worry about yourself, you can’t always accommodate the beliefs of others about you, proving them right or wrong in life, sometimes you have to just worry about yourself, and do your best to survive and practice a disciplined life, it may not be a fancy life, but live your life as best you can, starting with appreciating what you do have in life, and what positives you have to offer the world, based on your skill set. Its never too late to try new things, sure having dreams in life is important, but where is your reality, what are you capable of achieving in life, are your standards of wellness too high, are you expecting more or yourself, than you are capable of right now, how big should your goals be, and what can you do today, to bring you closer toward achieving your best mental and physical condition. You can have problems in life, but its not always necessary to harp on the negatives in life, if you have since grown past those points of issue in life, where are you now, if you recognize what led you astray then, then do your best to stay well now, you can’t always make sense of the past, and if you can’t move past your own issues in life, best not to add to discussion the wellness of others, or question the past motivations of others. If in the past you have assumed the actions or words of others to have been directed toward you, then let go of those delusions in life, if to articulate only empowers others to create a belief about you that you think everything is about you, the world is a big place, no one is that powerful individually to influence the decision making of others, especially if they are arguably not doing well in life. If I’m not famous, then please do not add to instances of defamation past, and allow me to overcome mental illness. Eventually we are all affected by losses in life, don’t contribute to the nervousness of others by being an unstable companion in life or friend, that just increases the likelihood of you becoming dissociated from others and treated as mentally ill the more you isolate, and the more time apart from others you spend, the more room for rumor you leave while inactive socially, thinking more about life than the time you spend living your life, at some point you have to move forward, and as you adjust to living a healthier life, have faith that others will adjust to your wellness, and not be bothered by your successes in life, or bettered condition, not expect more or less of you, and be able to blend in again. Its not about who you know in life, its insulting to not be credited for ones abilities in life, and extended efforts to remain anonymous, treated as though my identity resulted from issues concerning the past, writing is my gift in life, my strength. You can be so kind as to share your story, and still be made fun of, that’s unfortunate. To be treated as less than, based upon who you know, or for what losses or punishments you have suffered in life, no one deserves to be made fun of until suicidal, that’s something that needs to stop, highlighting the failures of others, allow people to move forward, not hurt them or put them down every time they get well in life, not be referenced to.
The times are not archaic, you may have a good idea to help bring people together, and it may still not be in the best interests of everyone to care. You have every right to care about causes and provide support to causes you think are necessary to the betterment of society, what issues you raise awareness to, should be as it relates to your life and experiences, and if as to the experiences of others, they come first, think what would be in their best interests. Take good care of yourselves, that’s best how to represent oneself, others cannot represent you in life, unless hired to, that’s always an unwanted burden to others to be available to help correct thoughts about self, or to help correct the thoughts of others about you. What may be obvious to some is not obvious to all, all are not exposed to the same connections in life, or belief systems. You choose your systems of support in life. Always with approval take initiatives in life, never without the blessings of those above you, that’s not how to make a positive difference, learn to be able to let things go if you want to help inspire change to the systems we currently provide support to, and where help is needed most. The chaos of loss, and the uncertainty that brings has much to do with the wellness of those around you, people don’t change, that you have to accept, people will always care most for whats in their best interests and if its not in their best interests to care, they wont care, some initiatives you take in life may be premature, based on what you are focused on in life, and what affects you. Don’t volunteer or become apart of organizations to correct your image, if you volunteer and then are punished, then correct your mistakes in life, and with permissions, continue to make progress in life. Not all will be in agreement with you, post punishments in life, don’t expect people to speak highly of you or trust you, there will always be room for question thereafter, don’t feed into that negativity, by behaving in ways or speaking in ways that support a negative viewpoint of you, that’s why they say to prove them wrong, that’s if you are currently facing adversities in life, not to go backwards and make your life more difficult, the mental health issues you suffer as a result of your mistakes in life, are never the responsibility of others to correct, if of your own making, you have to help yourself under those conditions, no one will lead you then, no one will correct you then, no one will advise you then, no one will redirect you then, unless you ask for help and permissions in life, that’s how best to move forward and interact with others in a way that both you and your audience are comfortable with, not under any obligations to care. In life you continue your education, that’s to match the times, every profession has their requirements, that’s normal, be fearless, but do not incite fear or worry in others, if something you care about has not affected them yet personally, everything adds up, not that we are all connected, but anything that goes wrong on the inside of any system of support, is the responsibility of those vocal within to correct, the tone of the environment, everyones safety needs matter, focus on your reality, without worry for those who have messed up in life due to drugs and alcohol, that’s why we are advised to care for ourselves first to be able to help others, and until we can learn to help ourselves, love ourselves, will we be able to help provide a voice of reason to others. When we say mental health comes first, that means if you’ve been there then don’t go back to those places in life, and if you cannot help, don’t make worse the condition of others caring for you, allow people to worry for themselves not about others, only you can help yourself. In a year I can apply again as a victim advocate, right now Im battling mental health issues ie self-harm, trust your systems of support, and as advised move forward in life.
Chances are once you get to a better place in life, you’ll compare where you are now to where you have been, that’s perfectly normal, to reassess what needs work, and figure out what you did right, to get to where you are now. Don’t be so hard on yourself. In fact, “ruminating” has been found to interfere with ones ability to “implement[t] the behavioral changes necessary to prevent a relapse.”  It’s the very thinking about your own issues, not just the past, that may prevent you from staying present now, I assure you its just an adjustment phase, and like all days pass, allow time to pass, recognizing your own self-worth, and how far you’ve come. Its not just stigma that’s cause for embarrassment upon disclosure of diagnoses, but also comparisons to others who have not been well in the past, dumbed down as the same as, or worse than, you’ll never feel like yourself, if youre in constant worry as to who youre being compared to in life, keep your world small, its not necessary to inspire others or demonstrate any type of leadership when it comes to wellness, once you achieve well, your mental health comes first above all else, especially when fragile new to stability. A healthy outlook is not demonstrated by your words, but by your actions in life, and your future is determined by your present, not your past necessarily, if you can let go of that much, then do so. Its what you do from this point on that matters most, not by focusing on what people think, or by what is inferred by your presence around others or actions in life, live life as best you can, if keeping busy keeps your mind off where you’ve been then keep busy, if keeping busy keeps you from discussion of problems that send you through a whirlwind of negative fears about your present abilities in life, then don’t send yourself off into a freeze, nows not always a good time for therapy and overfocus on oneself, that can be easily be mistaken for selfishness, don’t worry about interpreting the behaviors of others, as everyone is doing their best to cope with their own version of reality, and portray themselves as they see best fit, know that not everything is about you, just as its wrong to use associations in life to bolster esteems, don’t subject yourself to being used to similarly bolster the esteems of others, by being vulnerable, retaliated upon, as less than, its not necessary to assert ones intelligences in life, confidentiality is so important to maintaining trust, and to be taken seriously in life, not look small minded or be treated as an opportunist in life, looking for a step up in life, if you cannot achieve on your own, don’t expect help from anyone to help you achieve, maintain autonomy , when it comes to relationships and building rapport with others, co-dependence is not a healthy show of acceptances in life, for one personality to dominate anothers, healthy leadership enables growth, fosters wellness.
The past is past, the longer you stay in shock fixated on what has not gone right for you in life, you’ll never move forward. Once you achieve a well state of mind, pat yourself on the back, and welcome back, that takes a lot of hard work, discipline, and listening to others to get well again and stay well. The more you rebel, defiant to the concerns of others, the more difficult it becomes for you to adjust to reality, you get put down, pushed aside, and left behind for a reason, not because people don’t love you, but because they need to focus on themselves and don’t have the time to waste either helping you, or redirecting your thoughts toward positives, that is something you have to figure out for yourself, you either listen or turn a blind eye to feedback along the way, don’t take anything too personally, just do your best to take into consideration the suggestions of others, you’ll likely look back on those moments in a positive way thank them later, even if at the time you feel small. Confidence takes years to build, and with practice excelling at your strengths in life, while recognizing your weaknesses in life, those experiences in life will only make you stronger, and I promise you those insecurities and awkward feelings about yourself will change. Its okay to be yourself, some are gifted in that way, affected by every little thing people say to them, sensitive, reading too much into everything … never assume as insult toward you, most people who are insulting do not mean to be insulting or insensitive to your feelings, they are usually just trying to help, if ever critical of you or others, pointing out whats wrong, instead of buffering whats going right for people in life via compliment, some are just not programmed that way, to compliment, cheer up, or bolster the esteems of others. Trust that your time to shine will come again, if youre used to being the best at everything, standing out from a crowd, then learn how to handle standing out during your worst moments too, being the best comes at a price, people expect more from you, and are harder on you expectations high of you, to impress or prove that you are who you are on paper, be everything past as you are now, that is you, and even if you have been through changes in life, that make you not feel like yourself anymore, forgive yourself and others, at some point you have to move forward, in order to live life as you are now. Theres a lot of stigma, associated to those who suffer from mental health issues, treated as drug addicts or alcoholics, blaming drug use or alcohol as a cause for their mental health issues, while those things may have contributed to incidences of mental illness or poor decision making in the past, those flamboyant episodes of confidence and grandeur will surely be forgotten the better adjusted you are to who you are now, having had those experiences in life, I’m sure people are mostly concerned with their image not yours, and their health, not your past, and the only thing people care about now is your wellness now, to determine whether or not they want to be in the company of anyone who has had a history of mental health issues, be affected.
Before things fall into place, its easy to feel anxious about where your going and where you’ve been in life, worried what people will think, or what people have thought of you, and keep moving forward life. Don’t beat yourself up over the past, whats gone is gone, time lost, best you can do is make the most of the time you have now, and the years you have left to live life. No one has an easy life, everyone faces difficulties, feeling accepted, and feeling good enough in life, we all have insecurities in life, whats most important. Discussion of the past is only helpful when trying to move forward and processing what you’ve done wrong or could have done better in life. But processing the past is best done with a working professional, who specializes in what is ailing you, not just anyone, and especially not with boyfriends, they’ll be less than understanding of you, mistake your hyperness for mental illness, or your depression for thoughts of suicide, how much positive energy is required to be around others, and to speak candidly about yourself, without being discriminated based upon who you are in life, your upbringing, or where you’ve been, how long does it take to overcome feelings of self-harm, and where does recovery start? All recovery starts with an admission, in order to begin any stages of the recovery process, one is required to admit they have a problem and what with. Its easy to jump from one addiction to the next, replacing old needs, with new problems, and it still will all add up and send you back to the same position in life, admission of your illness and or addictions in life. How you get judged by others for your addictions, depends on who you are some forgiven some not, based upon your experiences in life, who you know, and work experiences. Sure love will keep you afloat, thinking beyond yourself, about someone else, but no obsessions in life are healthy obsessions, not of your own thoughts, and especially not of the thoughts of others, that you’ll have to learn to let go of in life, fears of what people think.
Its easy to get wrapped up in your problems and miss out on a lot in life, too focused on yourself, bettering yourself, there are limits to how hard you need to try in life to feel successful, and fulfilled. Everyone needs their alone time, but how much alone time is too much time alone? If you want to meet Mr. Right we are told to work on ourselves, or that we’re not ready yet … watching the years go by, you have to maintain a steady faith, that as you put your life together, opportunities in life will avail themselves to you to meet new people, date again, and find your matches in life. You’ll meet someone through work, definitely not the place to go looking for love, or to become too attached to anyone in your immediate surroundings socially unless, you know them, know your worth, don’t be too difficult that you make others feel small, but always have enough confidence to walk away from situations that are not doing you any good in life, that is doing things to feel good or look good, chances are if you spend too much time alone bettering yourself, reintegrating will not be easy for you, although you feel good, that time away creates a void of time missed being around others, that is the sacrifice you make when you choose yourself, over spending time with others, that’s your choice, whats more important excelling at personal goals in life, or helping others to achieve the same, by being around them, its hard to feel good on your own without the company of others, you always wonder what life could’ve been like if you just stopped to smell the roses every once in awhile, not darting out from home to home, busy studying, if you need to be alone to focus, then its time to rethink your abilities in life, you have to be able to leave a situation and enter another situation center of focus in order to be successful in life, you wont always have to choice of focusing on one thing at a time, that tired feeling in between is just an adjustment phase, figure out how you work best, its worth the time in between foggy, that simply means youre not where you want to be in life, however you wont get to anywhere in life if you don’t feel good about the quality of time spent on self and around others, that time must be balanced.
Whether it’s a new project, or a career move, get moving, the longer you wait, the harder it becomes to start over in life, or to get finished. Everybody leaves and comes back to assignments in life, that’s normal, while multi-tasking. Book writing, dissertation, job apps, in what order all depends on your energy level and wellness, and when push comes to shove, starting even when you don’t feel completely ready, sometimes, you’ll never be ready unless you try and get going again in the first place. Don’t leave gaps in your resume, self-care is important, but no more than a few months to 6 months rest in between jobs, you have to keep going, and if you choose to stay in school and work, then make sure you set your priorities right, otherwise you end up unhappy with poor time management skills and nothing gets done on time and life slowly stops turning out the way you wanted it to be and you start feeling behind in life. Always maintain a positive attitude, do not resent others for your failures in life, or for times when you felt misdirected in life or lost, you are always responsible for your outlook in life, no one can change your thoughts except you, it doesn’t matter sometimes what meds your on, if you can’t stay positive its hard to make anything turn out right for you in life. Mental health is not a new trendy concept … its something we have to deal with on a daily basis, that is our own wellness, and sometimes by putting our needs before others, that doesn’t mean don’t think of others before yourself, and be a selfless decision maker, if the needs of others are paramount to your own needs, then be centered in that way, everybody is different, some more or less selfish than others, when it comes to their own personal health and setting boundaries for themselves, it takes a certain degree of acceptance to be treated as an equal in life, don’t expect that much from anyone, everyone is at best doing their best to represent themselves, their posture and tone may have nothing to do with you and everything to do with themselves, the image they are trying to portray, not to you specifically, to generate a response from you, don’t read into things too much. Your future awaits you, and your potential is limitless so long as you don’t forget where you come from, and what brought you to this place in life … where you stand now could be different in 6 months to a year, pick and choose your battles wisely, and never fight with the past, it rarely leaves you feeling good, usually worse off in life, be mature, have a sense of humor, but not at the expense of having some self-respect.
You can’t build an umbrella campaign, and use figures in life, to represent sides, or to add or take away from sides, and you certainly cannot marginalize people in life based upon their attachments. It seems as though as soon as you recognize fears do fears play a role in your life, and interfere with your social skills. The bigger you think you are, the more difficult it may be to adapt to your surroundings or feel like you can relate to others, on a basic interpersonal level, its easy to be judged when you are overcompensating for mental health issues, as unfit not given the benefit of the doubt, having overcome mental health issues, what doesn’t lift you don’t enable to allow you to fall. Why some people are not incorporated into the lives of others, we have the power of choice in life, who we surround ourselves with, that is the privileged, everyone else, who has no choice but to fit in, should do so naturally, blend in. When difficult questions are asked of you, don’t become frustrated or slow down your trains of thoughts, always explain with your best interests, its okay to be defensive, you are in control always of how you respond, whether or not the conversation is being guided by another, always stay positive about self and others, you at the end of the day must argue from your perspective, and if an argument is looked for, always end things on a positive note. If youre being interviewed, and have suffered in the past, you will be asked to explain yourself, you don’t have to talk about yourself, in a way that scares people away from hiring you, if youre not ready to work, youre not ready to work, but don’t give up and file for social security disability, you just need to find placement, and start somewhere. Disability does not have to be a life long process of negative turns in life, if you stay sober, and do your best, work, and go to school, you can live life on a part time basis, managing your mental health issues, and if no one believes in you, then maybe its not your time, maybe youre not ready to work, part time or full time yet, just work the hours you are able to work, and take it from there, you cant push yourself to burn out, take your time in life, pace yourself, theres no need to rush getting well, because once you get well you have to stay well, and pressure when well or suffering, can be overconsuming at times, don’t have a defeative attitude in life. You are as capable as you believe in yourself to be, always have faith in yourself, you cannot listen to others who put you down in life, and obsess over negative opinions about you or others, that only leads you down one road: illness. If youre not able youre not able, you don’t have to explain yourself, we are only capable of doing what we are prepared to do in life, some able to take on challenges in life, but you certainly wont get far in life, self-harming, no one wants to hire a pity party or charity case, always be honest.
Better to be information packed, than say nothing at all, it depends on whether you want to be abstract left up for interpretation or specific. How much do you want to help others, through social media. Things to keep in mind:
There are no experts when it comes to social media, some have more experience than others, comfort wise sharing in public, its not for everyone, some prefer to have private accounts, and share only among close friends, not make new friends online, there is however a growing population of people with public accounts, Im new, and one of them. Its hard to go backwards and share your life up to date, it gets depressing, but just share from where you are now, is whats best, its not necessary that you share a timeline of your whole life, just share what speaks to who you are now, always present the most positive version of yourself, and leave the rest up to your audience to interpret, your growth, your potential, and your progress, otherwise you should be focused on doing your best, not slacking image wise, if youre online, be professional, the more tidy you are, the easier you are to follow, read, and be around.
Let the dust settle, you can’t rush into anything new in life, if you don’t have a steady hand yourself at life. Everything in life requires balance, if you are not balanced individually makes it difficult for you to be there for others, let alone start a new relationship that requires you to care for someone other than yourself. Its never too late to pick up a new hobby, start a new job, lose some weight, and if you think of all these things upon meeting someone, the better. What are your motivations in life, love? Success? Matrimony? Well you can’t have it all, unless you are willing to handle your past, if you can’t discuss that much, well then youre not ready to move forward, theres no beating around the bush about it, you either are able to own up to your faults in lfie, and handle your business like an adult, or you shy away from your problems, poor me-ing until no one is left around you to support you, don’t be one of those people. Its hard to get going again in life, its hard to start dating again, finish a masters, or get back in touch with old friends, self-harming is not the solution nor is using drugs or alcohol, that’s not the solution to handling your problems, regressing, or not taking life seriously. If you can’t take yourself seriously, don’t expect anyone else to take you seriously either. Everyone wants respect, and a career they can be proud of, if youre not happy with where you are, its better to start somewhere, than to stay home and do nothing at all. If you blog, blog with pride, and by all means put it on your resume, its something to be proud of being a writer, even if you don’t get paid for it, it shows hard work, and discipline, and ability, to generate a following, maintain an audience, and shows some maturity and leadership skills on your part to take the initiative and put yourself out there to be read by others, self-publishing on your own. These are big steps in the writing world, writing, then sharing your finished products, without fear of rejection, criticism … that takes courage. Whatever your motivations in life are, I wouldn’t say to always put yourself first, but put what matters to your most, first, and all else should fall into place based upon what your focuses are in life, and if its you, find yourself before finding others. No one can fix you but you, and if you expect that, then its time to have a more positive attitude in life. Nothing gets handed to you and everythings hard work.
Its not a bad life, living with mental health issues, it’s a matter of recognizing your progress, and knowing that even when well, not all days will be good days, like everyone you will always have your bad and good days. Are you doing what you’re supposed to be doing? Are you communicating too much from you? Are you doing more than you are thinking? We can be good at some things and not good at all things, never make your problems or deficiencies of issue to others, you will likely be judged in the negative for your insecurities in life, not everyone can buffer you, your wellness, everyone has their own issues, just be understanding of the wishes of others, and be sure to set boundaries for yourself too. If enough boundaries are set, think why is this happening to me, and what could I be doing better. Sometimes it has nothing to do with you, sometimes it has everything to do with you. Who is your support group? Should you be sharing all that information with them? I wonder sometimes is everyone on your side in life, and what causes one to think that self-sabatoge is espionage or someone interfering with someones ability to function or be happy in life. The more you focus on yourself, and the less you focus on what others are doing and thinking the better you’ll feel while in recovery … it’s a process: forgiveness. You can’t expect change to happen overnight, or for the opinions of others to change about you, people will always test your boundaries in life … its all a matter of not enabling others to get under your skin control you or how you feel about yourself, no one can babysit you in life, until you feel better again, that’s self-care learning how to fix oneself without the need of others to help them, as an adult you should know, whats working for you, and what needs work, not everyone will be able to identify whats wrong with you, that’s not their job to pick you apart, or for you to pick yourself apart in front of others.
These past few years have been very tumultuous in the news, and besides trying to figure life out, has probably been a challenging few years for everyone, not just myself. There are personal problems and there are world problems, don’t therefore make the problems of others your problem, react less, listen more in those cases you’re likely to learn something new, without holding an opinion yourself about things. Sometimes while learning or listening to others share their opinions we have thoughts of our own, not as directly related, but helps to put into words, what cannot otherwise be stated. That’s always a problem. Especially difficult concepts such as death. You would never think that someone who is a self-help writer online has a history of self-harming, that doesn’t make sense at all, to present oneself as stable and then go backwards in life hurting oneself, by whatever means are available … that’s addiction, whether its alcohol, men, or drugs …. You choose your poison in life, allow things to happen in your life, that benefit you, not hurt you. That doesn’t make one a hypocrite to do one thing and say another, that’s just not following through with your own advices in life, its easier to help others than to help oneself, I don’t think I’m the only one with this problem. Going back to work presents its challenges, given my history, I’ve acquired enough sober time over the years, to be a better decision maker, I got sober 2014, and stopped dating and stopped working. That’s not the solution cessation of all activities that present risks of heartache and rejection, that’s life, life is difficult in that way, not everyone will like you, you will not be included in everyones life, the world is a big place, and youre lucky for the time you get to spend in spaces with others, just be happy to be apart of in those moments in time, the rest will follow, if you stay diligent in your efforts to better yourself, so that you can be surrounded by good people in life. Mental health issues don’t just go away with meds, you have to respect yourself enough to value your wellness, and keep doing what youre doing to stay well, whether its writing, or working, maintaining some disciplined schedule that keeps you going in life. You can’t always make people your life forces in life, to help keep you motivated and going in life, sometimes you have to rely on yourself, what to do in the event you feel like self-harming and not doing so, its not selfish on the part of the harmer, its not that they don’t care about others, its more that they don’t care about themselves, being where they are in life or based upon where they have been in life, not happy with themselves now. Best to do things that make you happy in life, and steer clear of things that bring your esteem down … those with the highest self-esteem value themselves, value others, and maintain a positive outlook in spite of their pasts, strong.
Obsess less, if you want things to go your way in life, focusing all your attentions on one person ... won’t make them like you more, or want to be around you more. The opposite usually occurs, people are attracted to those who are busy focused on themselves, that’s the best way to attract a mate in life, have something going for you in life, without putting all the pressure on them to tie your shoes for you. Love comes and it goes … its not something required for happiness, but it is something we all deserve to experience once in our lives. What is it that you want in life, and do you want things for the right reasons, what is your purpose in life. To be loved? To work, have a career? To be well known? To write share your mind? People blog for different reasons, not always for good reasons, self-accolade can only get you so far in life, especially without a paycheck. Sure everybody knows you, knows your pen name, but how much do you really matter to the lives of others. Having meaningful relationships is what makes you whole, not how many people you connect with or by how many likes you get along the way. Value yourself, and by all means when you find someone you really like, put all your eggs in one basket, even if it means ignoring your Eminem pen pal on messenger. Eventually you have to face reality … and date in real life. It requires being put together, its hard to go places in life, or be out in public without a job, its like having nothing to wear, or talk about, don’t be a bore. Everyones always excited to be around successful people, its like theres an air in the room, that lights everyone up. Be that person, able, lit up and positive, that doesn’t require medications trust me, a lot of cardio and face cream, youre energy is determined by not only how well you perform in life, but how well you light up to others … your aura is based on how well you feel on the inside, and it shows when your well to others … aging is a process, but you don’t have to beat yourself up over time that’s been lost focused on the wrong things in life, or the wrong people, if you want to wait 6 years, wait to date, if you still don’t have yourself put together by that time, then you should really question how productive youre being meeting your goals …. Are you staying sober? Are you taking your meds as directed? Are you going to bed at a reasonable hour, all of that matters as to your energy. Always talk to your Doctor … depression comes and it goes, if you can overcome those hardships mental health wise, then youre that much closer to living a better life, working, and not filing for disability, giving up.