LYS #48
The best way to control a situation that leaves you feeling uncomfortable is self-control. Anyone who doesn’t speak normally to you does deserve no-response. If you’re on the end of no-response don’t take that personally, everyone has their own lives and when they have done their best to support you give them too time to themselves to adjust back to the normalcy of their day. Once you get back to normal allow time for the dust to settle you can always make an amends later, apologize. Accept yourself for who you are now! Not everyone finds their place in life. Once you know who you are your likes and dislikes it makes it much easier to be a better decision maker how to respond to others under any types of pressures in life. Be happy with who you are where you are in life. If you can’t stay positive it’s best not to say anything at all, chances are you’re more likely to hurt the feelings of others having shared best to not share at all. We each have our own lives, better to handle your problems on your own without affecting anyone who may care about you. When it comes to love don’t overdo things ... the tendency is when you want something to work out you try too hard then things don’t pan out for you. The trick to love is by focusing on yourself. Everyone wants someone who is smart, successful, and self-sufficient it’s hard to be with anyone co-dependent on your daily for reassurances, don’t be one of them, insecure. Pick and choose your battles in life. All people take adjusting to you are not unique in that way. Not all things people say will be filtered. Sometimes you have to filter yourself. Don’t let anyone bring you down in life. No life is perfect not even a double life ... you just have to keep moving forward. Less excitement sometimes leads to better choices in life that does not mean that you will find better if what you like has it all. It’s hard to find someone to envision that with not all are lucky enough to find and create a family of their own. Be grateful for the attentions that others give you in life but know your place and your part not to interfere with the relationships of others. LYS #49 Always be kind you never know what anyone is going through. Be sensitive with your words. Whatever bothers you if you keep it at the forefront of your mind will continue to bother you unless you pick up and do something else. Why ruminating over the past or others is bad for your health mental health. You should always be focused on yourself don’t worry if others are reading you judging you poorly that’s not your responsibility to correct those judgments of you. Just do your best to live your life for now irrespective of what people thought of you then as compared to now, hopefully with a better outlook more positive things will be said about you as watched versus unnoticed. Living in the public eye online keeps you under watch don’t be shy about your progress be sure to share good things about yourself too not just your past. Note to the Readers: (Re: My Mental Health) Sometimes there’s no going backwards after you hurt the feelings of others, that can be felt both ways they insulted is not always one side and the one to whom insult comes from does not always intend to insult from who is insulted and from what. Life isn’t perfect hold everyone to the same standards in life not one should be held to a higher standard than another we all do our best to #behuman ... not everyday need be serious discussion of social ills some days worse than others but it’s not necessary to criticize those who become ill to the insults of others claiming by knowing them embarrassment has occurred that’s insulting to the writer. Then don’t read something to make it about you feel insulted read something else. You don’t always say the right things especially when under stress the tendency is to sound argumentative. Don’t rally yourself up over emotions. Know when to stop and hear yourself toward positives again. It’s important to stay calm when under stress. You’d think everyone has noticed but you’d be surprised by how much others don’t know about you. Be yourself. No one can read you’re mind if you’re not feeling well it’s best to speak up. Don’t assume just because no one is helping you that no one cares. We are all human beings with our own sets of problems and cares. Being there for one another during times of need. Never be so selfish to assume no one cares we all do when you self-harm, stay well. Learn to go with the flow - in any new relationship less is more while getting to know each other, be sure not to over share about your past if you plan on having a future with someone. The tendency is we see new think they need to know everything about us past to get to know us, to achieve a deeper level of understanding but sometimes they feel close to you as is, so be sure not to ruin that much. Love yourself enough to know when to quit. If you keep loving the same things and getting hurt well then it’s time to start loving new things in life. There are so many things for you to do other than obsess over any one person or thing ... you can: read, watch tv, watch a movie, listen to music, catch up with friends, write letters, clean your room, anything other than think about who or what is bothering you, be strong, stay proactive. Life isn’t perfect you will have your off days, days when you’re tired and don’t feel like you can keep going and days when you’re doing okay but able to push yourselves. It’s important to be patient with yourself. Life works in that way not every day will be a good day. Just stay positive nothing good can become of negative thoughts or emotions. It usually leads you astray whether it’s in talking to someone or through writing ... “one thing leads to another” and so a fight happens. Just do your best to see the good in others always don’t get paranoid easily and don’t fight where no fighting is necessary especially if you’ve not interacted with anyone and it’s all in your head. Don’t get led astray by your assumptions in life. Sometimes it’s painful to lead discussions out loud just as painful as it is to hear about such losses. But it’s better to speak than say nothing at all you never know who is at risk of harm unless you say so. You’d be surprised who’s connected in life and it’s not always be choice we are contacted but because we mean well people connect. For whatever reasons you become frustrated self-harm is not the correct response to what discomforts you, at that point the most important thing for you to do is to be comfortable in your own skin not act out or do anything that would make you or others uncomfortable as observing you. Everyone deserves a right to privacy to figure out their issues on their own and figure out why they’re self harming that’s for no one to judge why someone gets sick or for what reasons be judgmental toward them. #stopsuicide Those who self harm or are suicidal are not attention seekers but people who may struggle with depression or bipolar. Don’t draw attentions to issues that are not your own and if these are issues that speak to you then the more power to those who care. Not all those who self harm bear guilt not all those who self harm do so on purpose and not all people who self harm do so to feel good or to make others feel bad it’s mostly to do with a chemical imbalance within themselves. Give people time to heal from trauma and don’t spark controversies where none are do it’s important to know yourself set limits and let no negativities in life change your positive outlook as looking for attentions seeking attentions or be judged as a product of someone who self harms for lack of attention and or rejections in life. #stophate For the most part no one wants to hear your problems it’s not that they don’t care but it could be out of lack of empathy for someone they deem well or not deserving of being well or doing well in life do not be disturbed by others lack of empathy for you everyone has their own problems in life, to be best understood as doing well is to lead by example not just words illustrate that you are doing well you are who you say you are and that be sure to not set unreasonable expectations of self or allow others to set unreasonable expectations of you - we are all human not all professionals are the same by title or by career genre ... why it’s important to be accepting of all not everyone knows what to do you just have to be patient not necessarily show compassion but preserve your energy points for yourself daily. Be a good person it always helps when you have positive outlets of support. That doesn’t mean you have to have lived a perfect life in order to be a supportive friend, co-worker, or family member. Do your best not to be one to bring others down in life with your problems. Be strong you’ll thank yourself later when you are able to be there for others. It’s really all about support ... knock on wood to whom you confide in and get help from matters that’s the support back you receive ... usually it’s helpful to talk to people who know you sometimes it’s helpful to talk to people outside your social circle like professionals but be careful not to talk about others to strangers as they may be less compassionate toward you or others favoring sides ... know when to stop know your limits don’t allow the negative judgments of others toward you to affect your health and wellness. You cannot control what other people think but you can stay in control of your own thoughts. Always start each day in a positive way. I’ve been told to write down 5 things I’m grateful for each day, in early stages of sobriety this is helpful to maintain sobriety. Don’t be too hard on yourself remind yourself that recovery is a process that does not happen overnight. You have to think positively of yourself and others and express a willingness on your part to be forgiving of others too. There’s no letting go of self when it comes to losses that’s your time to be strong for yourself and for others. The more you wallow in sadness the worse off you’ll feel putting yourself behind in life. Always be there for others, say what’s on your mind, and never self-harm to any extent with excuses for behaviors such illness toward self affects everyone to see you unstable or not put together, don’t be one of them, always get help if needed. Be sensitive to the needs of others as much as people wish they could help you they can only do so much ... eventually you have to turn your life around on your own whether that’s by having a better attitude in life or just staying positive know yourself ... what keeps you going? If not for others you think you’d not be well then thank them, if not for others you would have no found yourself again well then apologize to them ... we all get lost sometimes you only have one life to live and so much time in front of you to correct your mistakes yesterday and past that starts with acknowledging what’s gone wrong today and start each day new that’s living daily. #mentalhealth Remember the good times but never get so nostalgic that you get depressed thinking about now. Are you where you want to be in life? If not what’s keeping you from reaching your goals? Is there more work to be done? Than do so. Could you be a happier person? Then start being more positive. Could you have lived a better life? It’s time to start appreciating now. Do you value yourself? Well then forgive the moments in life when it appears you did not. Life happens slowly ... if you’re a steady improver ... don’t expect overnight change ... a little bit each day helps. Set smaller goals to fulfill larger ones. LYS #50 Whenever things are good it’s best not to complain you then run the risk of hurting the feelings of those who care for you not make better things between you guys. Sharing the past is okay but not to the extent you make yourself or others look bad always be thankful for the help and support you receive in life. Believe in yourself ... no matter how much anyone supports you that’s something you must do for yourself. Not all days will be good days life is not perfect but never stop doing your best you’ll thank yourself later for it. Don’t be so hard on yourself ... think wisely and be sure to always filter what you do say on days that’s you’re negative you’ll likely beat yourself up over it later. Even if you’re not at your best value yourself ... relapsing is about giving up never give up on yourself chances are things get worse for you each time you go out and give up on who you should value yourself most you. It happens ... just pick up from where you left off and keep going whether it’s showing up to meetings, seeing a life coach, or going to therapy always do your part to stay well. Always maintain composure ... even on your worst days be a good decision maker the only person you’re letting down is yourself. To be admired is to be loved and to be loved is to have love for self ... if you are admired but cannot still love yourself then you have a problem with self-love. No one can bring you happiness unless you cannot first be happy for yourself. You are more a product of your own unhappinesses in life than a product of the unhappinesses of others. Just stay positive every time you share it’s open for interpretation by others only you know you best what you’re about it’s not necessary that you explain to anyone where you’re coming from those are your problems not for anyone to judge you by what bothers you. Don’t get too wrapped up in the times do your best to live a solid life keep busy and steer clear of negativity that’s sure to bring you off track in life. Rest assured all things will fall into place the more you know what you’re about and the less you allow others assumptions of you to pull you off guard left to your defenses in life. Never self harm in self defense to anyone’s worry of you you know you best ... self harm is never the solution to defective thoughts about self and no matter how many people give up on you never give up on yourself. You’ll love a lot of people in life ... if not just one. The main point of love is monogamy finding someone to give love to and share your life with. It starts with one at a time ... no matter how long you have to wait in between. The best is having those rocks in life you can rely upon to be there for you in times of need. They’ll always be there for you if you’re good, once you leave a relationship it’s hard to go back. If you can’t have it all that’s okay ... youre not required to. Just be happy with where you are now and who is around you. Understand your places in life and make the most of your days while you are here. Think what is it that makes you happy and do so. With everything in your reach there’s no excuse for unhappiness. Whatever it takes to be an optimistic soul do so ... whether it’s walking in a park talking with a friend or getting coffee that makes you feel good do so. Life’s short but not that short enough to have lived the years to your life to the fullest. Never stop improving yourself each day is a day to better yourself. There’s too much beauty in the world to get upset over the little things in life. If what you want is more out of life well then you’ll find it difficult to achieve while fretting over the little things in life. Time moves slowly ... remind yourself of that when you think life is short or times moving by too fast that’s just the stress of time being here now and thinking about where you want to be while others are around to see you grow and achieve.
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“If you don’t know me by now” you never will ... is how most relationships feel after the 1-3 year mark ... if you have to question staying or leaving stay, love is more important as a challenge than it is coming to you easily -sometimes what’s best for you are the boundaries, nights alone, and silent treatment it’s not all about you allow your partner their alone time that’s allowable. Do they make your heart sing? ... Well then trust them. Do you feel like you can’t live without them? ... Well then be patient. We wait for the best things that life has to offer ... you won’t always get your way.
Be grateful for systems put in place to help others if we did not have flyers, a website, music, or film we all would not have marched continued to do nothing about people dying: DJs and Public Figures ... its way too much pressure on the inside over a few off beat movies and songs ... never assume entertainment intends to insult reality it’s mostly to help all make sense of reality not to poke fun at people to cause them illness as associates or create experiences for them to share ... be like or incite jealousy or blames by casting them out to look like had I not made a website my opinions would not be known for insult comment or reply because I have a website and wrote 5 books my opinion is valued. I’m finishing my dissertation under the professional guidance of my professor ... and I am excited to graduate from law school this year and work on establishing a career for myself as a writer in tech and entertainment professional working in film distribution. Everything takes time if you’re not on the inside then do not blame those who apply to organizations it’s for supervision not accolade positive attentions not recognition and to help all not further instances of coding for pleasure added humor or to belittle others bully and cause voices or mental illness to those on the inside such as myself to a big story. #witnessprotection #victimblaming #advocacy #righttoprivacy #stopsuicide Even when no one is looking it’s important to do the right thing. Sometimes what is right causes hardship, sometimes what is right is difficult to achieve, and sometimes there will be no one to guide or direct as to what the right thing to do is. Most of us remain silent, it’s in silence strength is garnered by not having to get involved in the emotions of others. Think what will happen if I don’t say something before speaking nows always a good time to revisit what ails you so just in case others are suffering they don’t have to suffer too with you. Be clear about your purposes in life it’s always with good purpose good is achieved. Don’t get too emotionally invested in your past it’s what is now that’s important ... you’re likely to get sick in worry about things past that don’t matter now. Think what is relevant to your recovery and maintain positive outlook. Be wary that whenever you go backwards you set yourself back ... be wise you have ample time in life for progress it’s going backwards that’s sometimes a waste of time. If you can’t win in life don’t fight that’s not how to overcome sadness, self-hate, depresssion, or unhappiness. You usually rebel when you’re not where you want to be in life or by thinking things are about you become defensive. Let the dust settle ... You can’t force life to happen by your thinking ... when you’re not thinking right, that’s usually when you’re putting things together wrong, just stay positive. It’s only when positive ... things pan out for you well in the long run. Positive thinking goes a long way, chances are if you’re uncomfortable by your thinking patterns others are too. When you leave things up to guessing games much like the overdisclosure of personal information about self versus seeing you professionally in public is likely to make those judgmental of you more judgmental ... anything you say to describe others gets used to describe you and place you in the position of being them as described why only to say good things about others not be too descriptive of self or others judged ... set up for judgment. There’s a difference between good humor, hesitation, confidence, labeling, and being a smart alec, either you know that difference or another being condescending toward you thinks you’re stupid by comparison to others treats you in a position o be judged ... whenever you talk about anyone the side of the other is immediately taken and that comment is redirected toward you ... you only cause your self-harm when talking about others in private or public, that’s reporting to all to fix what’s gone wrong. Just when you think you have yourself all put together you fall apart. That’s recovery ... knowing when to stop well that’s self-control. Living with mental health issues is something you have to manage daily. “Never give up on yourself.” Some days will be long you’ll wish for it to be tomorrow but to get anywhere fast takes discipline. Enjoy your moment for now you can’t fast forward to the completion of any goals in life unless your actively working on pursuing those goals presently. Youll be much happier at the end of the day having had worked toward what you want to get done then avoid getting done what needs to get done putting energies elsewhere. It’s important not to revisit subjects once you get well in any direction that causes you harm to go backwards thinking about its best to always move forward value your new condition and not take risks going backwards. Don’t pile on regrets in life and don’t pile on resentments or mistakes in life that’s only turning on yourself. If to return to any places or subjects causes you illness then by all means move forward there will be places you can and cannot go in life and if that’s backwards then so be it. Be careful not to put blame on others when things are not going right for you in life it’s bound to wind up in argument leaving you to your defenses. Instead own up to your mistakes in life without putting yourself down in the process. You’ll feel much better having come forward with feelings or secrets about yourself you need help with than bottle up and beat yourself up over it. You are you not that your stuck with being yourself but you have to figure out on your own mostly what systems of support work best for you and being alone left to your own devices is sometimes not healthy not to talk about what’s bothering you. You’ll be happy to know once you do share there are plenty of people willing and who care to help. It’s times like these we reflect on what’s going well and what we could be doing better. Whenever blames are placed upon others, and chaos erupts don’t take things personally, what goes well for one country may not go well for all. Never cease to continue putting systems in place that support those who have been affected. Always do your best not to overwhelm others with your problems problems are best talked about in the privacy or a therapeutic environment. You can’t solve your problems on social media. You can’t rely on others to chime in when you’re not doing well. Therefore always do your best not to affect the peace of mind of others through the discussion of what’s ailing you. Live life without regret ... know that you are human we all make mistakes however the fewer mistakes you make the better off you’ll feel. You can’t undo the past you can try to explain it but it’s better to have live a life to the fullest than not lived at all mistakes included. Be proud of who you are, be proud of all your imperfections. Stay grounded. Take from it what you need and let the rest go. Any situation that winds up uncomfortable means it’s time to leave or separate from that person causing you discomfort. It could be either you or them ... to avoid argument ... especially when people are moody it’s important to take your separate spaces in life. That’s how to correct poor thinking, or attitude, it’s always wise to take a step back. Whatever the underlying cause is for mental illness know your limits in life pick and choose what to think about and who to think about that’s your choice something you can control. What you can’t control is what people think of you who they think you think about and the underlying causes for your thoughts thinking things are not what you are writing about as applied by them based upon your fundamentals of thought ... if it applies it applies but you cannot force exact application of thoughts to derive the basis from which a thought is had, thinking is not an exact science it’s part choice part influence part education part exposure part environmental ... your brain chemistry is your right to privacy it’s no ones right to pick you apart as well or put you down when up always be in control of your emotions ... it’s by how you respond others will think of you. #stopsuicide Heavy times do not mean heavy subjects ... in fact when things get stressful outside of your immediate lives the lighter the subjects the better. Most avoid anything too heavy ... it’s not that they’re insensitive it’s just that they’re focused too much on their own lives to care. Don’t draw attentions to yourself unless to contribute positively to what’s around you. As a general rule of thumb if it makes you uncomfortable to discuss out loud what’s bothering you chances are others are bothered too. It’s best to be strong when the times get tough ... everything in moderation. Addiction it comes and it goes ... when your mind leaves you best wits about you and better decision making skills seem far away remember who cares about you, those lucky enough to return to their old self know clearly who knows best who to trust and where to go in times of fear and disillusionment know that you’re not alone and with proper maintenance and practice of sobriety you too can be among them the well and the present back to your old healthy self. #recovery Set limits for yourself whether it’s by redirecting your thoughts toward positives, being more disciplined, or setting daily goals come up with an action plan ... the days you fall off beat left to your whims ~ follow your heart, you can journal your way to success always - one of the best ways to tell how you’re doing best to share your thoughts be corrected than keep things to yourself, sometimes you can help yourself other times you need others to help you stay on track never beat yourself up over what you can’t control in life and stay focused on what makes sense. #selfharm Life isn’t perfect. Love isn’t perfect. But you’re perfect just the way you are! Hope everyone finds that special someone who lights up their life reminds them they are only human and who motivates them toward continued success. Live your life with passion. Be a perfectionist but not to the extent you fall apart trying. It’s just a bad day not a bad life. Remind yourself you’re worth it you deserve the best. The better you feel the better others around you will feel. Don’t make others uncomfortable at your own expense. You’ll thank yourself later for not bringing anyone else down with you when you fall. If you fall 7 times get back up 8 times, life goes on, get it together now don’t wait until the last minute to move forward in life. Its never too late to apologize. Sometimes owning up to your own faults is a step in the right direction. They say to “always keep your side of the street clean.” Be thankful for who has been there for you throughout your years in life and don’t expect much from those who have left your life. Everything happens for a reason. Making amends with those who have hurt you can sometimes be a freeing experience not circling back to that vegetative state of depression in bed all day with guilt, not everything’s your fault! Remind yourself “you’re one of the great ones too. |
AuthorLeslie Fischman Archives
August 2020
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