Its never required that we share our stories online. Some of us may feel compelled to share at our own expense, the loss of privacy that comes with sharing our stories online. Which is why I generally refrain from sharing my stories on Facebook, because it is the one place left that I consider private and separate from my Blogging life online on Twitter and Weebly, where I am an open book and willingly share my stories online to help others cope. I am by no means a role model to others but I am in every way an advocate for those who suffer from being misunderstood and discriminated because they are misunderstood. Misunderstandings occur, and often times our judgments of others are not perfect and flawed in many ways because (1) judgment is passed because we do not know the other well so assumptions are made as to why a person is behaving or is a certain way; or (2) we are misinformed of the reasons for why a person is a certain way or behaves a certain way or responds in a way that we do not understand because we do not understand the causes for the way in which they respond to events because again we do not know the person well enough and assumptions have been made. Assumptions are like judgments we pass on others, except they are the excuses for the behavior of others we use to justify the behavior of others in the negative. Be careful of doing so, judging others in the negative causes harm to their reputation and can be considered defamation if information about a person is misused to cause them harm or harm to others, others directly related to them or distant, which in turn causes harm to the person being wrongfully judged in the negative. Facts are facts, and no facts shared by me are with the intent to cause any harm to others or myself, in fact I share because harm has been caused to my good reputation which requires me to share in order for my story to be heard which would not otherwise be necessary nor proper to do so at a time like this when everything has settled down and I am now resuming my coursework in Law School. –Loss of privacy is my number one concern, in fact loss of privacy was the reason I reported to #FBIDC for further investigation. Because I am related to a very big case, I feel as though I was put at risk of harm and my sense of peace and privacy was being invaded for the personal purposes of others to get a birdseye view on current circumstances regarding the case and individuals involved in the case. That is not my job to provide a birdseye view and nothing contained in my computer provides for that because that was not the purposes for which I attended Law School, I took my LSAT and applied long before the case was reopened and a certain accused individual was sent to jail for a different crime. Similarly that was not the purpose for attending a US Supreme Court hearing, my purposes for being there were strictly to visit, but later felt compelled to write about whats been bothering me like I am doing so here, same tone and style except by the sharing of facts. –When misunderstandings occur it is important not to defend oneself by reinforcing any and all negatives about an individual to support your position, this only puts you and the person you are harming at further risk of harm. Its always best to leave things alone. When our judgments are in error and when we come to the wrong conclusions, its always best to just leave things alone and allow the facts to speak for themselves. It is not our responsibility to take facts and argue why they are the way there are and argue for what purposes facts exist which either support or negate a persons disposition in life and purposes or explanations regarding their decision making, choices, and reasons for why they are situated in positions in life that cause us to pass negative judgments on them or support campaigns to ensure negative judgment is passed on them. There are two misunderstandings regarding the causes for my condition (1) why I committed suicide; and (2) why I got a DUI. I committed suicide because my medication was flushed down the toilet and I went into withdrawals became bipolar and suicidal and swallowed a bottle of prescribed medication (Kolonopin) and do not remember anything afterward, woke up in the Hospital. Secondly, I got a DUI because I had 3 drinks and drove on the freeway (2 long island ice teas, and 1 double cranberry vodka) and this was my second DUI that Spring 2013 and could not get out of it, so I requested to just spend the night in Jail and not take the Sobriety test because I knew that I had had too much to drink that night. Prior to my DUI I have had no problems with the Law and a perfect and clean record. I now have a misdemeanor on my record, and am in the process of finishing my community service. I could not get back into Law School after I took 2 weeks off, my petitions were denied. That is why I could not finish my JD, and then I became suicidal and alcoholic, drinking every week. These stories are not important and do not explain why I have been discriminated because the discrimination and people being mean to me and being dumped occurred long before the DUI. That’s why I was drinking because my life was ruined. My Dream was to be an Attorney. My Dream was to go to Law School and finish Law School that was my purpose for being there and when I was not able to finish Law School I was heartbroken. Because I kept getting sick in Law School that made it difficult for me to finish, I started off strong with As and Bs and after dating, I got Cs and Ds and kept getting dumped by my boyfriend at or near or during finals weeks, which was very devastating and traumatic for me, so much so that several times I did not take my finals and withdrew from courses the day before exams, because I did not feel as though I was at my best and could do better. This was to protect my GPA, which needed to stay up in order for me to finish Law School. At this point I do not think I will finish my JD. But can still sit for the Bar Exam if I decide to the exam after I finish my LLM and study on my own, I believe I still have the opportunity to do so, with petition. –It is never required that we share our stories online. Sometimes it is best to just keep quiet and allow your professional work to speak for itself. Confrontation is never best when put under unreasonable pressure to defend oneself and ones reputation in public, is a very traumatic experience and causes me much mental disability. It is at my expense to share my story online and defend myself. It is at my expense and peace of mind to confront individuals who have harmed me. It is at my expense to address anything that I have already moved forward from. It is at my expense to expose myself to risk of harm and loss of privacy as a result of overexposing myself. If I was never trashed and dumped in the first place I would not be where I am today. If I was never trashed and dumped in the first place I would not have gotten a DUI and would not have been harmed during the time I was an Alcoholic and reputation damaged. What we do in private is our own business, who we sleep with is our own business, who we hook up with is our own business and never the business of others or their right to know, that is our privacy protected by the Constitution, our Right to Privacy, and there is good reason why we are afforded that privilege in life. Therefore if already dumped and trashed then why is it of any concern to anyone else if I trash myself. To me, why was it okay for others to harm me but not okay for me to harm myself, why was that so shocking. If someone is behaving a certain way it is because they have been caused to behave in that way and means that they have been harmed in some way, which causes them to harm themselves. That’s what it means when someone is suicidal and they are harming themselves, its because they have been harmed and that harm cannot be undone. *Be careful not to take explanations that are being used in application to my particular circumstances and then apply that rationale to a different set of facts that is wrong and results in a misinterpretation of facts and illogical conclusions. For every set of facts different arguments exist and must be made and no analysis of facts is universal and can not then be universally applied to any other set of facts containing sides in which good or bad character traits are sought to be proven. Only in my particular situation was my present circumstances of bad luck and being single being used to say that I am damaged goods and that I somehow deserve to be in the position that I am in now. I have no problem finding a boyfriend, I choose to be Single. I can go on Tinder anytime I want to find a date and move on. I choose to be Celibate. I do not have a job because (1) there was no job in Century City, he had to make a job for me, that was separate from my work in the office; and (2) my second job was taken by 3 engineers more qualified for the work that needed to be done for this particular startup. This type of required explanation in order not to pass judgment not only violates my own sense of privacy, but also violates my required duty to maintain the privacy of others during the regular course of my business dealings with them and terms of employment I agreed and signed to. But under these circumstances where harm continues and my luck does not turn around professionally, requires me to backtrack and discuss why I am being discriminated behind my back in chatter and for what purposes and what needs to be spoken about in order for those judgments to pass in terms of the gravity of harm they are causing to my current condition and ability to function and live a normal life. Otherwise the law does not protect us against people who simply talk shit about others, and pass judgments upon others in error, those are forgiveable offenses and if can be explained and reversed and no damage is done and condition can be removed then there is no cause of action that can justifiably be maintained on that persons behalf. This is my ideal conclusion, to not take anything to court and to resolve as much misunderstanding as possible outside of court without filing additional papers with the court explaining what kind of reoccurring harm is continuing and discussion in detail of how I am being harmed and the losses I have experienced as a result of people talking shit about me behind my back since before I got my DUI. I am already at a disadvantage in life. The advantages I have been afforded in life are because I am a great decision maker and a very honest and hardworking person. Please do not make my life more difficult than it already is to function daily, maintain a job, and finish Law School. I already left two relationships due to mental illness, which is why I am single. I am only positive online because my job as an advocate online requires me to be positive and present the best version of myself. Away from the Camera I struggle, I do not look well everyday, and I have my own ups and downs which I choose not share out loud because it is not helpful at a time like this and it interferes with my ability to do my job online which is to make people feel safe, not to cause harm to myself or others, or present any information which could be misused to cause harm to myself or others. That is an ongoing concern, and has been a concern throughout my campaign which is why I have not shared my writings online, because there is too much room for misinterpretation without explanation and argument, purely facts presented, not open for argumentative purposes, which I believe they were misused for to cause me harm or inadvertantly used to cause others harm behind my back. Now I know that whenever facts are presented on behalf of myself or others to also at that same time present arguments on behalf of myself or others, for the purposes of abiding by my duty as a law student, I am legally not allowed to represent others, so the best way I could present facts were to present facts in which the arguments were self explanatory, and which the innocence of others was preserved and never intended to result in a negative judgment. Evidence of this is obvious in the outcome of the decisions I have made which have been for good purposes. I am still at Thomas Jefferson School of Law, finishing my LLM I only have 12 Units left (a Degree that requires you have completed a JD in order to get into, I qualified for via the numbers of years and units of Legal Coursework completed); and my Brother got a job at Harvard as a Professor and Doctor. My Family is very proud of us I think we have come a long way, we don’t fight anymore, we understand eachother better, and I think we are doing a much better job of representing one another in our own way by doing our best to excel in our chosen fields and adhere to exemplary standards of ethical decision making and the manner of professionalism we apply to the work completed by us for review, in order to continue achieving and be able to provide for ourselves one days, and Families one day. Always note that when you cause harm to one you cause harm to many and when one is harmed by themselves that requires no additional harm be justified to further highlight or argue that that harm was caused to themselves. We know this I committed suicide, that’s a harm caused to myself, not by others, which is what I have been saying over and over again since 2009 and moved forward why is it again be readdressed now or being questioned, for what purposes, in application applies to no arguments for or against which would justify the usage of such facts to argue why my present circumstances are the way they are. I am not suicidal, and my present circumstances if not doing well are for different reasons not the same reasons for which I was not doing well in 2009. Therefore irrelevant to readdress old information and apply it to new information or old argument to a new set of facts, as we discussed before that results in misinterpretation. When someone causes harm to themselves no one else is harmed, usually people are mad at that person for harming themselves, but they themselves suffer no emotional harm or broken hearts, just get turned off by that person and lack empathy for their struggles in life. That is understandable. That I understand, when I cause harm to myself or commit suicide that is no ones fault but my own that is harm caused to myself as a means for coping with my present circumstances, Ive never placed blame on anyone for my present circumstances I was not raised that way to blame others for my misfortunes. That’s called a cop out, when you do not take responsibility for your own decisions and choices in life and misfortunes, it is then to no ones benefit including ones own to blame others for the sake of misplacing guilt or causes for harm upon another to somehow alleviate the guilt or harm being experienced by one for causing harm to themselves. I am a great decision maker, just because I hurt myself does not mean I have been a bad decision maker or responsible for the harm caused to me, experienced by me, or responsible for the harm caused to others as a result of the reoccurring harm experienced by others who talk shit about me behind my back, that is not my responsibility to correct, I can only perfect my own position in life, not the positions of others, it is not my responsibility to perfect the positions of others to help them live in a morally righteous way in which they can move forward from whatever ills they are currently suffering from that cause them to cause harm to others or reinforce harm causing agents to another. Why is that the case? Because when I am experiencing harm, my only responsibility is to take care of myself and correct that harm which I am currently suffering from which I take responsibility for as a product of my won decision making and not wrongfully place blame on others for my present circumstances. Therefore it is not my responsibility then to address any potential harm caused to others by my condition if not caused by me but a condition caused to me which is my responsibility to deal with on my own, because my decisions are what I am responsible for not the decisions of others who have caused harm to me. Just because something is my responsibility to address and cure on my own, whether a product of my own decisions or the decisions of others, as stated earlier is only the responsibility of the one harm to help themselves cure that condition or current defect or undo the harm currently being suffered by doing their best to represent themselves. One cannot best represent themselves or undo harm caused to them by their decisions or the decisions of others if they are placing blame on others or not taking responsibility for their own decision making. Therefore it is wrong to place any individual who is currently curing their own condition and perfecting their decision making skills in a position to accuse or defend themselves or others, for the sake of applying current facts to previous facts to argue the causes for conditions, that again results in misinterpretation of facts and wrongful application of information provided to cause harm to an individual who has already stated that their current condition is a product of the choices they have made (i.e. me – drinking, drug use, DUI, and suicide attempt in 2009) unrelated to my present circumstances, in which I am not suicidal and I am not sexually active, and I am not being raped, and I am not using drugs, and I am not using alcohol, and I do not have a boyfriend, and I am not in law school, and I am not working, and I am not going out, and I am not social, on its face, nothing is that same or similar as the time when I committed suicide or to any time in my life for that matter. I am making great decisions in life right now, if I become suicidal it is because my health is failing because I am 31 and Single and wish to be Married and with child and a job, and it is taking longer than necessary in order for that to occur. Simple. Not complicated understandable, any other application of information or misinterpretation in the negative is being done so to cause me harm and therefore is not necessary as discussed previously for me to address, my only responsibility now is to take care of myself, by law that is my only responsibility and has been my only responsibility to do so given these facts, in which a condition has been caused by harm to myself which no other persons are affected because I hurt myself and we know that I hurt myself and because I hurt myself my condition fails. No one is blaming anyone right now, and providing that reassurance out loud puts me at risk of harm and puts at risk of harm the privacy of myself as well as those who have harmed me which then subjects me to retaliation.